Hi. I just came across Essay Forum, googling around for essay help online. This is my first thread.
I need to write an essay for various Undergraduate Scholarships in Singapore. Given below is an initial draft I just wrote. Please proofread, asses and give me suggestions on the concept. Also check my punctuation and grammar.
I will be grateful for any kind of help.
Thanking you in anticipation,
Girish Rawat
Describe, in less than 300 words, the values and beliefs you hold strongly to. Please provide examples of how you have demonstrated these in your actions.
"The world of tomorrow belongs to the person who has the vision today"
-Robert Schuller
Just consider this.
There is more computer power in a Ford 1996 model, which everyone can buy and drive to the supermarket than there was in Apollo II when Neil Armstrong took it to the moon. In 1980`s nobody who wasn't a high energy physicist had even heard of World Wide Web. And now, even my neighbor's dog has his own page. Over the last decade we have more than doubled the rate of growth of industrial products worldwide.
How is the world constantly evolving for the better day by day? Is the betterment of world a God automated process which is directly proportional to the passage of time? No. I strongly oppose this view. Change does not come by itself. Facebook and Apple didn't come out from vacuum. Architects didn't start building random constructions that would be called Rome one day.
Change come from dreams. Ambition, Aspiration, Vision, Leadership-whatever you call it--The `Drive to Strive` factor is what that makes the human race supreme. Had Steve Jobs stopped dreaming of creating a better phone,just because of lack of a graduate degree, Multitouch would have been a technology limited to science fiction movies. Had I not dreamt of running the most coveted marathon of the country, fearful, I would have never participated in it.
The older I get and the more aware I become that I have more yesterdays than tomorrows, the more I think that in our final hours which all of us have to face, very rarely we will say `Gosh, I wish I had spent more time at school` or `If only I had made just a little more money`. But we will think about dreams we lived out, the wonders we knew, when we were most fully alive.
There is more computer power in a Ford 1996 model, which everyone can buy and drive to the supermarket than there was in Apollo II when Neil Armstrong took it to the moon.
wow, clever idea :)
There are more automatic features in a Ford 1996 model which everyone could afford to buy and drive to a local supermarket than the Apollo II, which Neil Armstrong took to explore the moon in 1969.Ok, what you are trying to talk about here is that you believe that every person needs a vision to succeed, isn't it? Then you need to focus on that more. And also you have failed to fulfill this requirement too;
Please provide examples of how you have demonstrated these in your actions.
I strongly feel you need to align your answer more with what your prompt requires.
