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"Key Club" - Help on my UC Personal essays



michellezonkThreads: 1
Posts: 3
   
Nov 25, 2008, 01:44pm   #1
Hello I am not sure if these are good enough or relating to the prompts so I need help on both of them please. Thanks very much.
Prompt 1: . Describe the world you come from for example, your family, community or school and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

I signed up for Key Club at the beginning of my sophomore year. I always said that I wanted to do charity work so I figured that Key Club would help me find some. At first I didn't know anyone in the club so I sat alone in meetings and was reluctant to sign up for any charity work. Thinking that I wasn't getting anywhere by acting this way I summoned up the courage to sign up for my first event, Kids in a Box. Kids in a Box was an event where a bunch of people raise money for a local family shelter and on one night sleep outside in a box. I was prepared to be by myself for the whole entire night but that didn't happen. When I got there and started making friends. We whispered and giggled the entire night. It was fun and it made me feel and my thoughts about Key Club changed from pessimistic to optimistic.
After that I became more involved. It seemed to me that I could make friends easily in a club whose goals were the same as mine: to help others in the community. I signed up for other activities such as book sales to raise money for a library in Ethiopia, a protest against a war in Uganda, ringing bells outside of stores (Salvation Army), reading books to children, and so much more. I have spent my sophomore, junior and now my senior year doing such activities that help my community and some parts of the world.
Thanks to the advisor of Key Club and the leaders who were always informative and very friendly they helped me really get involved and I became an active member. In fact, they know me very well now. They always check me off immediately on the list for meetings because they always know I'll be there or if I am not going to be there I give them a head notice the day before. I recall this one time when there was a committee for an organization called Ethiopia Reads that raises money to build libraries for people in Ethiopia. At the key club meeting the leaders announced that anyone who signed up for it must come after school on that Friday to help make boxes for certain places at school for kids to drop books in. So I signed up for it and so did twenty other people. On Friday after school I came to the classroom where we were suppose to meet and I was the only member on that list to show up to help the four leaders and the advisor. They praised me for showing up and called me a reliable member, which of course made me feel good about myself. I loved the fact that they could rely on me to help. It feels good to be needed.
Each charity I did was enjoyable and rewarding which I have Key Club to thank for that. Without them I wouldn't probably done any charity work and I can't picture my high school life without them. Key Club changed my perspective on life on how not to just think of yourself and to help others around you. I plan not to stop my community service in college and to join clubs similar to Key Club so I can continue helping my community and hopefully the world.

Prompt two: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?

I love History. It is who I am, it is what I live for, and for the past two and a half years I have known that when I go to college I would study something dealing with history, which I have one experience to thank for helping me decide that decision for me.
Before the summer of 2006 I had no clue on what I wanted to do in my life. I liked graphic design and I also wanted to be a doctor. But during the summer of 2006 I attended summer school where I participated in the four week World History course. Before that class I knew a little of history and I didn't care that much for it, but as the class progressed I soon grew to love history.
For the four weeks I had two teachers - one of them had a family emergency. Both I respected very much because they were very committed to their job. Everyday there was a test and every night there was a packet for homework. Even though I groaned at first with the rest of the class I soon had grown to love it. I learned a lot by doing it instead of what other world history classes where doing by watching movies. I became fond of learning about the various revolutions, wars and certain historical figures. My favorite historical periods were the Renaissance Era because I like to hear the many tales of the Tudor family, and World War II Era because I felt a connection to it since my grandfather lived in Poland at that time.
Sadly, World History came to a conclusion but a new me emerged. Instead of reading my normal child fiction books I started reading historical and historical fiction books. I found myself looking up terms from different centuries and writing my own stories about certain decades. History also got me interested in politics because I felt that we are the futures past I watched the news stations like FOX, CNN, and BBC so I could get all opinions and not just one side. I started reading online and the newspapers. I particularly became involved in politics when I worked at the election polls for two elections.
That summer changed me for the better. I felt like I was resurrected. I figured out what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I wanted and still do want to get a major in history. I know most incoming students aren't sure on what they want to study yet but I feel confident that I will do well in this subject because I'm very passionate about it. I want to learn and teach the mistakes and the villains from the past so we don't have repeats of the same incidents. If History has taught me anything it is that a person must be knowledgeable of the past to determine his or her own future.



michellezonkThreads: 1
Posts: 3
   
Nov 25, 2008, 03:14pm   #2
Suggestions are very welcomed. Thanks!


EF_Team5Threads: -
Posts: 2,649
Author: Gloria, EssayForum.com
   
Nov 25, 2008, 05:45pm   #3
Good afternoon :)

How has Key Club changed your dreams and aspirations? You should delve into that a bit more at length in the first paragraph.

How does this make you proud? This needs a bit more explanation.

Other than that, I think they are both fine pieces so far!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com


michellezonkThreads: 1
Posts: 3
   
Nov 25, 2008, 06:24pm   #4
Thank you very much! I will work on it!


EF_Team5Threads: -
Posts: 2,649
Author: Gloria, EssayForum.com
   
Nov 25, 2008, 06:25pm   #5
You're very welcome.

Keep up your hard work!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com




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