Good afternoon :)
I have edited the first section of the essay and then provided some more general comments in regards to the remainder of your piece:
"Whenever I watch Hollywood movies, I focus all of my senses to my ears to understand what the actor or actress says. I am a female who is very interested in learning English. I was admitted to Seokyeng University, which is located in Seoul, Korea (Which year; this year, last year, next year? year. My major was English and I was very interested in learning English. My school had given us opportunities to teach English to high school students among us who had gotten good grades, above 3.5 GPA. I was one of who taught English. It was also a great opportunity to realize that it is a very important duty to teach English to Korean students as I was an English major at my university. So the only reason it is important to teach English to Korean students is because you majored in it in college? Isn't there a better reason? During the period of attending university as an English education major, I could obtain steady desired in learning English and educate student in Korea. This doesn't make sense; please clarify. The result was coming out with a scholarship six times in a row from the university."
I'm not really sure about the content of your essay. Have you been to college already and majored in English education, or is that what you wish to do in the future? What does the scholarship have to do with the rest of your essay?
My main concern here is grammar and mechanics. It is difficult to decipher your meaning because of the grammatical issues. To help with this, I suggest one of the books from the "Prentice Hall Guide for College Writers" series written by Stephen Reid. You can pick any of them up cheap used, or get them from the library. I think there are six in the series now, and any of them would help you here. Or, there are many free online grammar guides that can assist you; type in "help with English grammar" in your internet search engine and you will get tons of information.
I hope this helps!