Helping students to become successful in life; Lehigh / values and priorities

2. If you founded your own college or university, what topic of study would you make mandatory for all students to study and why? What would be the values and priorities of your institution and why? 150-250 words

If I founded my own college, I would make a course about Diversity and Inclusion part of the curriculum for all students. It would work as a seminar where students learn about the way words and simple gestures can affect the people around them. After learning about the way their actions can affect others, students will speak to each other and reflect on how their words and gestures made each other feel because one may say something and inadvertently hurt another's feelings. I believe this is very important because it will help students to think before they act to avoid hurting someone else's feelings; this can even be handy when students go on to job interviews as they will be able to understand what not to do, thus helping them perform better in the interview and possibly get the job.

The values and priorities of my college would be based around helping students to become successful in life. I believe that being successful in life will allow people to be happy, however being successful is not limited to having a lavish job. It is also about being an all-around nice person because being nice to someone could make their day, and bring the same happiness as having a great job to both everyone. The Diversity and Inclusion seminar will teach students about the effects of their actions and to think before they act, and, ultimately, allow them to be successful and happy in their lives.

Any feedback is welcome, thanks!

made each other feel - change to: could make each other feel
one may say something and inadvertently hurt another's feelings - change to: students might say something and inadvertently hurt others'
I believe this is very important because it will help - change: This is very important: it will help
s; this can even be handy when students go on to job interviews as they will be able to understand what not to do, thus helping them perform better in the interview and possibly get the job. - change: , this can be handy when students go on job interviews, as they will understand what to do (find a synonym for 'what to do'), and help them perform better in interviews and possibly get the job (reword? a little awkward).

to become successful in life. - very abstract. how about: to become successful in achieving their goals.
I believe that being successful in life[ /font] - Successfully achieving goals (or something other than starting with "I believe")
will allow people - will allow students
This might just be me, but this sentence seemed irrelevant to your topic. It is also about being an all-around nice person because being nice to someone could make their day, and bring the same happiness as having a great job to both everyone.

allow them to be successful and happy in their lives. - allow them to successfully achieve their goals and be content with their results.

I liked your essay, and you make great points. I can see through your essay that you are sympathetic and your traits show through your essay! Your essay was unique in employing diversity studies. My corrections are suggestions: you can take them or leave them. If the corrections seem to hinder your essay, leave them. But I hoped I helped! Good luck on acceptance to Lehigh, (btw, i'm applying there too!) and would you mind looking at my essay pt 1 of Lehigh's supp. ?

Thank you so much!
I saw your topic, but I didn't click on it because I was intimidated if other people's essays were better than mine. I'll look at your essay right now.

Good luck to you in the admissions process, as well!