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"Growing Up On A Farm"-Common App Essay


NDBROTHER101 1 / 2  
Dec 4, 2011   #1
I really need help. Which one do you think should use for my Common App? I could really use some advice. Thanks!!!
I will post all three options here so you can get a better look at them. I could really use help since I'm not familiar with what kind of essay an admissions counselor is looking for.

This is for the topic " Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you."


#1
Growing up on a farm is an opportunity few kids have today. Less than one percent of the citizens of the United States claim farming as an occupation. Approximately two million farms exist today, and the number continues to decline. Based upon these statistics, I consider myself fortunate to grow up on a farm. The experiences I have had while growing up on farm are innumerable. Every day there is something different going on in the farm.

I always enjoy wintertime on the farm. My fondest of memories comes from the winter season. The road in front of our house becomes covered with ice every winter. Fortunately, the road has a huge hill in it. One day my brother and I were thinking of something to do on a cold, blustery day. We thought about how no one travels down our road so we decided to take out our sleds and go sledding down the icy hill. It was an awesome time and it was better than sitting in the house. At the end of the day I began to think of how great it is to live on a farm because in the city we would not be able to do what we did.

Sadly, all of my winter experiences were not this fun. One day during the winter, we got over two feet of snow and the wind was gusting over forty-five miles per hour. To make things worse, the temperature was well under zero degrees Fahrenheit. Well, the goats and chickens needed to be fed and they also needed water. Therefore, I put on my ten layers of clothes and went outside to do my chores. I had to trudge through five foot drifts to get to the animals while carrying two five-gallon buckets full of feed and water. I had snow flying in my face constantly and my face was numb within about five minute after stepping outside. To make matters worse, the water bucket for the goats was all ice. I had to spend several minutes chipping away at the ice to make room for the water I was about to pour in the bucket. Needless, to say because of the treacherous conditions it took me fifty minutes even though my chores usually take me thirty minutes. However, since the chores are required to be done twice a day, I had go through that miserable experience twice that day. Sometimes, it can be so icy around the farm that it I will usually fall about seven times while doing my chores because it is so slippery. Each time I fall I just get back up and keep plugging away. Someday I will have major back pains, but it is worth the opportunity of being raised on a farm.

These experiences have made me glad that I was raised on a farm. Not everyday is easy, but the tough times I went through have made me a stronger person. The trials and tribulations that go along with living on a farm will only make me tougher and work harder. There are times when I wish I lived in the city, but then I go outside and feel the remoteness of living on a farm and hear the animals in the yard. I wouldn't pass those experiences up for anything and I wish people could experience the same things I went through while living on a farm.

#2
Growing up on a farm is an opportunity few kids have today. Less than one percent of the citizens of the United States claim farming as an occupation. Approximately two million farms exist today, and the number continues to decline. Based upon these statistics, I consider myself fortunate to grow up on a farm. The experiences I have had while growing up on farm are innumerable. Every day there is something different going on in the farm.

Wintertime is the best on a farm. Trees, fields, and barns covered with snow provides plenty of scenery and there are many things to do in the winter. My favorite past time is sledding on the road going by our house. Sledding was always a blast and the remoteness of a farm road made the activity possible. Sadly, not everything about winter on a farm is quite enjoyable as sledding. One day during the winter, we got over two feet of snow and the wind was gusting over forty-five miles per hour. To make things worse, the temperature was well under zero degrees Fahrenheit. Well, the goats and chickens needed to be fed and they also needed water. Therefore, I put on my ten layers of clothes and went outside to do my chores. I had to trudge through five foot drifts to get to the animals while carrying two five-gallon buckets full of feed and water. I had snow flying in my face constantly and my face was numb within five minute after stepping outside. The water bucket for the goats was all ice. I had to spend several minutes chipping away at the ice to make room for the water I was about to pour in the bucket. Needless, to say because of the treacherous conditions it took me fifty minutes even though my chores usually take me thirty minutes. However, since the chores are required to be done twice a day, I had go through that miserable experience twice that day. Sometimes, it can be so icy around the farm that it I will usually fall about times while doing my chores because it is so slippery. Each time I fall I just get back up and keep plugging away. Someday I will have major back pains, but it is worth the opportunity of being raised on a farm. This experience may have seemed terrible at first, but I learned a lot from situations like this.

My motivation to keep working has strengthened by living on a farm. Five foot drifts do not stop me and neither does any other obstacle that comes my way. Also, my responsibility is tremendous from living all of my life on a farm. Even though the conditions outside may be less than desire sometimes, I still have to feed the animals otherwise they will starve. Furthermore, farming allowed me to become more active in my community and it is the reason why I am the president of my 4-H club. Farming is not always fun, but it builds a strong work-ethic, responsibility, and involvement. I look forward to using these skills in college to improve the lives of others and work hard for a strong academic degree.

#3
Growing up on a farm is an opportunity few kids have today. Less than one percent of the citizens of the United States claim farming as an occupation. Approximately two million farms exist today, and the number continues to decline. Based upon these statistics, I consider myself fortunate to grow up on a farm. The lessons I learned and the skills I acquired from my experiences on a farm have shaped who I am today, and those valuable lessons will help me in the future.

By growing up on a farm, I developed a strong work ethic at a young age. Whether unloading hay bales on a scorching summer day or cleaning the animal pens, I always completed the tasks. Moreover, it requires hard work to complete the daily chores necessary for the animals' health. Even with grueling Iowa conditions, chores must be done, and I always work hard to accomplish them. Growing up, I learned that only through a strong work ethic can tasks be completed successfully.

Additionally, I obtained a strong sense of responsibility after years of living on a farm. Every morning and night, the animals must be fed, and I am responsible for making sure these chores are completed. If I fail to complete the tasks, the animals' health is put in jeopardy. I have learned that even though I may not want to go outside to do my chores, they need to be completed. Many of my teachers and classmates now rely on me because they know they can count on me, just as the animals depend on me. I make sure I do whatever they ask of me.

Finally, I acquired strong communication and business skills by growing up on a farm. After I purchased my first chickens and goats, I came to realize that farming is a business. I needed to keep my finance records up to date so I would not lose money. Also, I needed to keep production records to make sure the animals are producing to ensure I would make a profit after considering all the feed and costs that are inputted into each animal. I needed to communicate with local farmers in order to sell my product and to purchase equipment or other animals from them. I also needed to communicate with local businesses and newspaper companies in order to market my animals. Without communication, a farming business cannot be successful.

Looking back, it is hard to imagine myself without the skills I have acquired while growing up on a farm. A strong work ethic, responsibility, and excellent communication and business skills have helped me run a successful business, and these skills translated into my strong academic performance. All of these skills will allow me to continue to be successful after I graduate from high school. I desire to share my experiences with others who lacked the same opportunities I had growing up. I look forward to being able to use my experiences from living on farm in the real world and to help make this world a better place.

Thanks so much!
Ezekg - / 1  
Dec 5, 2011   #2
hi ND, your essay is really interesting. of course the topic you used is unfamiliar;one good point.
secondly it is a rare form of experience. I like the essay. however, you were able to highlight the importance of the experience to you, but then it should include how it affects your school choice and how your college would benefit from this experience.
OP NDBROTHER101 1 / 2  
Dec 5, 2011   #3
Oh sorry I forgot the topic. Here it is: Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.

Thanks Ezekg for the help.
OP NDBROTHER101 1 / 2  
Dec 6, 2011   #4
So what do you guys think is better for a college application?
jsturm31 2 / 5  
Dec 6, 2011   #5
In the beginning, you repeat "on the farm" a lot. Try to diversify your sentences a bit.
EF_Susan - / 2,364 12  
Dec 7, 2011   #6
These are exactly the same essay! There is not one word different on essay #2. There's quite a bit of editing to be done, so maybe you can find the other essay and decide which one you want to use, then send it through for an edit.

:)


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