'education and opportunities engineering' Why interested in attending Georgia...

1) Why are you interested in attending Georgia and what do you hope to contribute to our community?
When I was in my Kindergarten I got my first award of General Proficiency from school for being an outstanding student. My parents were very proud of me that day. I still remember my Dad's words 'Keep working hard and achieve more laurels because it is only premier education that can make you reach that beautiful goal in your life'. Ever since then I have dreamt about various goals in my life, some of them I have achieved but other few I have not. Among them was my dream to study in one of the best engineering colleges in the world because I knew that only then would I get the best taste of success in life. I also believe that whatever achievements and laurels I have achieved and the kind of person I am today is because of the opportunities that the society has given me. Due to this same reason, I have always wanted to do something in life that would be beneficial for the society. This is one reason that I want to attend Georgia as I believe I can get the education and opportunities for development that I had always dreamt for at Georgia. Another thing I enjoy the most is meeting different people and keeping busy with various activities with them. I am confident that whenever I get the opportunity I will try my best to work with the people of Georgia and help in their betterment in whatever way I can.

I am going a little above the limit, can someone help me edit the unnecessary sentences. And is the idea that I have portrayed here right??Is this what they expect?I am an individual who has always undertaken whatever opportunity I have got. My friends even call me a workaholic cause U indulge myself soo much in whatever project I undertake for the people around me. Are these ideas of my true self portrayed well in my above essayy...really really need advise..!!!

'Keep working hard and achieve more laurels
because it is only premier education that can make you reach that beautiful goal in your life' my dad once said to me when I won the general proficiency award in kindergarden.

^Start like this, it will cut unnecessary words. Also don't use 'ever since then' because you really didn't think about your goals in kindergarten, right?

And the essay is well written but a little generic. Anyone could insert the name of another institution in place of Georgia Tech and it wouldn't make a difference. So try to include some specific things about the college in your essay. Good luck

thnx for the suggestion...=)