has influenced my life more significantly than the others
who has the most significance on me. and you should start with this directly. it's assumed that there are many people who have influenced your life
strong person that I am today
another adjective maybe? is it physically buff or psychologically tough? Strong is a generic word that might make you sound pretentious.
overall, you focus a bit too much on what your aunt did, and not enough about how that made a difference in your own life or personality. It also lacks focus. Do you want to go about education? or strength of character? or struggling with a job? if you really have to talk about all three (I wouldn't recommend... pick the one or 2 you really want to talk about and go in depth) then make sure that you say that in your intro: my aunt taught me this, this, and this. or she is this, this and this and here's how she influenced me.
It's easy to get distracted on pointless details, so try to narrow your thoughts a bit. most importantly, talk about you. the admin doesn't care about who your aunt is, but how she played a role in your life.