The love for politics - UC #1 Prompt

This is only a start to the prompt, any suggestions to improve this will be greatly appreciated.

The love for politics was planted in me at a young age but did not have the opportunity to sprout. It was not until a few years after that memorable event, that this passion began to develop. Following my freshman year at L'amoureaux Collegiate I found myself no longer situated in a familiar environment, I had immigrated to a foreign—yet not so foreign—country, the United States. The immigration process that I and my family had to endure coupled with the negative connotations of the "immigrant" status—I was ashamed to tell those I encountered at school that I was an immigrant because it made me feel like I'm a second class citizen—sparked my interest in understanding not only in my civil liberties but the political institution in the United States as well.

"in a familiar environment, I had immigrated" That's a completely separate clause, so in order for that to work, you need a colon.

"I'm a second class citizen" Your entire paragraph is in the past tense, but "I'm" is a contraction of "I am," which is the present tense.

Great intro, though you do use a lot of dashes, but if you feel that it is necessary (which I think it might be too), go ahead, be bold!

Again, as I said in some other kid's personal statement, make sure your essay on immigration is OUTSTANDING in both the "great" and "unique" sense, because this is an extremely popular topic.

Sounds good, but in the last sentence you use the work immigrant/immigration three times and it starts to sound redundant. Maybe you could find another word to use? Not sure if there is one. maybe foreigner?

Good luck!!

A love of politics was planted in me at a young age, but it did not have the opportunity to sprout. It was not until a few years after that memorable event, that this passion began to develop. Following my freshman year at L'amoureaux Collegiate, I found myself no longer situated in a familiar environment. I had immigrated to a foreign—yet not so foreign—country: the United States. The immigration process that I and my family had to endure, coupled with the negative connotations of the "immigrant" status, made me feel ashamed to tell those I encountered at school that I was an immigrant. It made me feel like I'm a second class citizen—sparked my interest in understanding not only in my civil liberties, but also the political institution in the United States as well.

The first two sentences kind of contradict each other.