Ok here's my final version.
Any comments?
During my freshman year of high school I was ecstatic to visit Columbia University's Miller Theatre for an opera adaptation of David Lynch's masterpiece "Lost Highway".
While waiting for the opera to begin, I overheard two Columbia students discussing several of Lynch's movies. As I heard their interpretations of many of Lynch's works, I marveled at their ability to develop opinions as a team. In my search for a college, I have desired, above all, an environment in which I can develop ideas as those brilliant students did. Columbia University has proven to be the greatest opportunity for this.
Keith Nichols