Grinnell Supplement Essays help

Grinnell has two supplement essays

one is "Please share with us how you first learned about Grinnell College"
and another one is "Grinnell College is a place where students come to be part of a distinctive community. Tell us what makes you an individual and what you could bring to Grinnell, but also tell us about what you wish to take away from Grinnell College."

For the first short essay, should i just put how i got to know about Grinnell (ex: My friend told me Grinnell is good school.) or should I write a paragraph explaning why i am interested in Grinnell college and so on..

I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I START THIS SHORT ESSAYS...HELP!
Due for this application is 1/1.. please help me ASAP experts!..

So far i have written this for the first short essay.. while i have no idea what i am writing
"One of our school students went to Grinnell College few years ago. I heard him tell stories of his meaningful and inspirational times, Academic achievements and success as a student he could have make at Grinnell."

When your friend told you it was a good school...what went through your mind, did you go to their school website or research it at all, what made you decide to apply?

As for the second one, I would pick out some traits that you want the college to know about you, since the essay is their real insight into your personality...and then make those traits obvious. As for what you want to take away...be honest. I can't tell you what to write, I'm not you, but I suggest you sit down and just write..don't try to make it sound good, just try and figure out how you would honestly answer the question..once you have that you can work at wording it more eloquently, and fitting it into a concisely written paragraph.

Hope this helps..I'm just sharing what I've read in a lot of "Writing College Essay" books. Good luck! (:

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Grinnell College Supplement Essay need help

1)Please share with us how you first learned about Grinnell College

"One of our school students went to Grinnell College few years ago. I heard him tell stories of his meaningful and inspirational times, Academic achievements and success as a student he could have make at Grinnell. I researched on Grinnell College, and was impressed not only by its experienced faculties, 90% of whom possess a doctorate or the terminal degree in their field, but also surroundings it has which it would provide students a perfect place to pursuit their dreams and talents with taking advantages of not located in the big city which might gives many disturbances to students."

Please look over my short essay alongs to the question, and leave harsh comments, corrections, recommends for this poor essay. thank you!

I think you could say "One of my friends" instead of "One of our school students"...even if he's not a friend. d: the way you phrased it sounds a bit awkward to me.

"One of my friends went to Grinnell College few years ago. I heard his stories of his meaningful and inspirational times (examples?), academic achievements and success as a student he could have make at Grinnell. I researched on Grinnell College, and was impressed not only by its experienced faculties, 90% of whom possess a doctorate or the terminal degree in their field, but also its surroundings it has which it would provide students with a perfect place to pursue their dreams and talents with taking the advantage of not being located in a big city, which might cause disturbance to students." maybe a conclusion of some kind; wrap it up? i don't know, it's up to you.

Anyway these are just a few suggestions, I hope this helps?

Thank you "X soundclash"
that helped me a lot.
You think whole sentences and story lines are awkard in overrall?

"I heard his stories of inspirational times, academic achievements and success as a student at Grinnell."

When you say "success" are you referring to academic success? I believe that academic success and academic achievement have the same meaning.

"I researched Grinnell College, and was impressed not only by its selected experienced faculties with respects from students, but also its surroundings which would provide students with a perfect place to pursue their dreams and talents with the advantage of not being located in a the big city which might cause disturbances to students."

This sentence is way too long.

It is unfortunate that many students do not know about such a great school institution like Grinnell College is not known to people today, it is fortunate that I am one of those lucky people who know the best school for the future

I don't think the last sentence adds much to your short essay. Also, I'm not exactly sure what you are trying to convey with your last line that I italicized.

Good luck!

One of our school students went to Grinnell College few years ago. I heard him tell stories of his meaningful and inspirational times, academic achievements, and successes as a Grinnell student. I researched Grinnell College, and I was impressed not only by its experienced faculties (90% of whom possess a doctorate or the terminal degree in their fields), but also the environment it provides. Grinnell offers students a perfect place to pursue their dreams while taking advantages of a setting that is away from the big city, which might cause many disturbances to students. and now add one more powerful sentence to sum it all up, instead of ending abruptly.

My only real criticism for you is that you are too critical of yourself! The essay is not too bad and your writing will continue to improve at Grinnell!

:)

Thank you EF Kevin you are the best :)
and I finally finished the two short essays. those rough draft right now. but would you mind revise my essays again? any experts?

1) Please share with us how you first learned about Grinnell College
- One of my friends went to Grinnell College few years ago. I heard his stories of inspirational times, academic achievements and successes as a person at Grinnell. I researched Grinnell College, and was impressed not only by its selected experienced faculties with respects from students, but also the environment it provides. Grinnell offers students a perfect place to pursue their dreams while taking advantages of a setting that is away from the big city, which might cause many disturbances to students. It is unfortunate that such great school like Grinnell College is not much known to people today, but it is fortunate that I am one of those lucky people who know the best school.

2) Grinnell College is a place where students come to be part of a distinctive community. Tell us what makes you an individual and what you could bring to Grinnell, but also tell us about what you wish to take away from Grinnell College.

-To complete the picture puzzle, each piece needed to be put on the right place. I am like one of that piece of Grinnell puzzle. Without my piece of puzzle, it cannot be perfect. Because I am independent, I find my place without anyone's help. And because I am persevering, I don't give up until I find my part. But, just ones independence and perseverance cannot finish the picture. So, each individual's independence and perseverance has to gather together to cooperate in one place for the completeness. When everyone finds the place to be put, we can therefore have complete Grinnell Puzzle. Although each piece of puzzle is from all different places, it harmonizes together with each unique characteristic. As being a piece of Grinnell puzzle, I take completeness, cooperation, unique independence, and perseverance and intelligence from Grinnell community.