Here goes a second essay.
As I steadily descended from the mountain, I soon began to realize that what had originally started out as a recreational hiking adventure had turned into an epic struggle for survival. Such was the result of my group unknowingly veering away from the paved trail. The consequence was a journey that truly tested my strength and courage.
The date was August 16, 2008. My friends and I were hiking in the vicinity of the Catskill Mountains. The mountain we ascended was much steeper than I had earlier predicted. Our destination on the mountain was a pool area that was created naturally by an adjacent waterfall. Faulty navigation led us to the wrong destination: the top of the waterfall. Thus, we had to make our way down approximately 100 meters, and in efforts to get to the pool directly, we had departed from the safe trail.
The path that we had taken went along the mountainside where there was nothing but a rocky, downhill slope. It soon became apparent that we were at the flat edge of the mountain where one could fall and take quite a tumble. I was no longer hopping gaily from boulder to boulder. Instead I was crawling on all fours with extreme caution. The threatening steepness of the mountainside only factored into the danger. My frictionless sneakers did not help either.
Although I was experienced in working through tough situations, I was not having fun. As a matter of fact, I was absolutely terrified. I knew one slip could lead to my ultimate downfall, pun not intended. However, there was no turning back, nor giving up for that matter. There was only one way out: victory. To me, victory meant not only reaching the ever-so-desired pool, but also getting there intact and breathing.
My fear of heights made me very nervous, but I did not let that get the best of me. Instead, I treated the situation as I would a physics problem, one which contains a great deal of confusing and tricky scenarios with numbers left and right. Such a problem would make me nervous as well, at first. My first step to problem solving is always to grab a hold of myself and make sense of the situation. I am on a slope with a relatively low coefficient of friction and must achieve a negative displacement of 100 meters, but not too quickly. Next I determine how the problem must be solved. I must maintain equilibrium while moving at a steady downward velocity and prevent gravity from overcoming my force of friction. My final step is to execute the process consistently so as to prevent error.
That is the approach I had taken to safely make my way down. With nothing but scarce trees and rocks in my view, I grabbed hold of whatever I could find and followed my group. Eventually, I got the hang of it and decided to lead the crew. I did not realize, however, that this was not very wise. I had brought myself upon a platform sloped downward with a tree branch barely in my reach. When I looked down, it seemed as though I was staring into a bottomless pit. I lay back, trying not to slip, and was about to cry for help. With my last ounce of courage, I leaped and grasped the tree. As a held onto it with my left arm, I pulled one of my friends to safety with my right arm. For the remainder of the descent, we worked together, and with my mind focused and my body cooperating, I was able to make it to the bottom of the slope.
Victory was mine. Although I was able to relax in the pool, I had trouble sleeping for the next few weeks. Despite the trauma, I had a desire for adventure. Success in the face of fear makes me feel brave in the same way answering a physics problem makes me feel smart. Maybe I can pursue free-fall motion and try sky-diving.
My first essay is here
http://www.essayforum.com/2_4852_0.htmlI'm not sure which of my two essays is better.
Also if you guys could help with shortening my short response to 150 words. Give me some ideas about what to cut out, that would be great. Thanks
Over the summer of 2008, I had the privilege of being an assistant teacher to a third grade class. This is my second time working at the summer camp held at my church for the past 4 years. However, it was my first full time summer job that was paid. Working as a teacher's assistant didn't need as much responsibility of being a full fledged teacher, but it was a progression into learning to handle more responsibility. I wasn't entrusted into teaching the lessons in Math and English, but I had to sit with my fellow colleague (the teacher) and make the lesson plans. Responsibility was also eased into my fellow teachers' assistants and me, because it was our job to take the children to lunch at the near-by public school. Let me tell you this, trying to keep an eye on 92 kids while walking only 8 blocks is a lot harder to the contrary to what it seems. Sure, I only applied for the job because it was fun, sort of laid-back, and my friends were working there as well. But I learned a lot from the experience. I learned that at a summer camp I can make a positive impact in children's lives; through teaching them morals, school knowledge, and life lessons.
Jeremy Liaw
top of page