the queen ,castke stuff is cute
yale is not the only one to have masters teas at all..lots of schools do it they just call it other names
thus, that characteristic does not make it unique
dont end your essay with thats why im applying to yale...very elementary...like when little kids write "the end" after they write a story.
i would say major rewrite
fix the intro sentence...say something more like. It is the unique Yale environment that draws me to New Haven....something more interesting like that
check out my stuff if you have time & i appreciate harsh comments