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As I study anthropology, my perspective on the human condition shifts. UNCW admission essay


JDO3689 1 / -  
Jan 17, 2015   #1
I need someone to tell me if this is a good enough essay to submit with my UNCW application.

Prompt: Reflecting on your personal and educational goals, please write about how you believe UNC Wilmington will allow you to grow as a student and as a person.

As a home schooled student, I was encouraged to direct my own education, and from this style of learning I developed a wide variety of interests, including art, film and anthropology. Anthropology in particular became a strong focus of mine. Once I enrolled at Cape Fear Community College, I gave a presentation in my public speaking class on human evolution and I discovered many students found the subject interesting but they had not been exposed to the information in the past. In my second semester, I researched the teaching of evolution in public schools for a writing class and found that human evolution was covered very little. After these experiences, I came to believe that people of all ages should be exposed to the history of their species, and it is one of my goals to educate the public through various mediums, including film and writing. I believe UNCW can help me reach my goals because of the interdisciplinary nature of the anthropology program and the diversity of the extracurricular activities.

UNCW's undergraduate program in anthropology suits me well because it requires equal time devoted to all the subfields of anthropology, without requiring too much specialization. It is too common for undergraduates to be asked to specialize in a subfield of anthropology even though the strength of anthropology is in its cross-disciplinary approach. Because of this, I feel that UNCW has the strongest undergraduate program in North Carolina. Since my goals are related to education, it is important that my education provides me with a well-rounded knowledge of the discipline.

In addition to the anthropology major, I believe film is a powerful tool for education, and I want to hone my skills in filmmaking for the purposes of informing the public. At UNCW, I envision many ways I could accomplish this goal; from including film presentations in the classroom and clubs to collaborating with like-minded students who are interested in Wilmington's film industry.

Ultimately, my hope is that I can do more than simply finish the degree I started working on at CFCC. I want to continue to learn more about myself and acquire the tools to be a lifelong learner. As I study anthropology, my perspective on the human condition shifts, and I feel a strong need to share that experience with others in creative ways. UNCW is the best university in North Carolina to help me grow in my knowledge and in my ability to share that knowledge with other people.
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Jan 18, 2015   #2
The whole essay is really quite insightful and strong. You have managed to portray your well rounded interest in anthropology and explained how UNCW will be able to help you achieve your academic goals and ambitions in the future. I have just one problem with your essay though. The part about your interest in film and visual arts needs some work. It is really not very well developed at this point and seems to be a sore thumb sticking out in what is otherwise a highly compelling essay. Now, the way I see it, you have two choices. Either you delete the part about the way you look forward to learning more about film and visual development along with your anthropology major, or you develop the paragraph better by pointing out the ways and means that you plan on creating a partnership between the two in the project that you will be undertaking while a student at the university. Whichever method you decide to go with will definitely be the best choice for improving your essay.


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