Being in soccer makes me happy and keeps me active.
Do not include sentences like this. This sentence is uninteresting, and it is obvious. Make sure every sentence helps to express one big idea... the idea that makes you want to write the essay. You want to leave the reader with one big idea...
never underestimate an opponent, never give up, leadership...I like your way of writing, but you express a lot of different ideas. In a space like this, you only have room to powerfully express ONE idea. So, make it an interesting idea that the reader will really enjoy. Focus on just one idea, and let every sentence help the reader understand and appreciate that idea.
:-)