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A prestigious education is at the heart of all goals I would like to pursue in life. USC Application


navreetbhangu 1 / -  
Jan 15, 2015   #1
Hi the USC Application is due tonight and I am answering the second prompt:
Describe your academic interests and how you plan to pursue them at USC. Please feel free to address your first- and second-choice major selections (250 word limit).

A prestigious education is at the heart of all goals I would like to pursue in life. Starting with a pre-pharmaceutical undergraduate degree from the distinguished, University of Southern California, I will be able to enhance my aspirations in the health field. I discovered that the USC Dana and David Dornsife College of Letters, Arts, and Sciences would offer me the rigorous curriculum I desire as well as assist my educational needs. Through this college, my first choice major would be Biological Sciences followed by Chemistry. Attending this college will give me limitless opportunities to go far beyond my current knowledge, therefore allowing me to obtain an exceptional foundation for guidance in my future endeavors. By engaging in the Trojan Admission Pre-Pharmacy Program, I will draw myself to a community of scholars who have the same goals and aspirations as me and will provide me with the motivation to further pursue my dreams. Throughout life, I have always wanted to achieve the role as a medical professional who can positively impact the lives of others. I genuinely feel good when being able to give someone the ability to live a comfortable life. A myriad of volunteering experiences from hospitals to clinics to elementary schools have led me to this holistic dream. At USC, I hope to familiarize myself with medical knowledge, so in the future I can help solve issues in health care. USC offers one of the most diverse and largest student bodies in the country. I cannot imagine a better combination to prepare me for pre-pharmaceutical studies and subsequently acceptance to pharmacy school, and being exposed to such a diversified study body that represent the world population is an immense advantage that makes a person one step closer to changing it.

Is there a way I can make it shorter, the essay is 293 words?
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Jan 15, 2015   #2
I was able to edit your essay down to 166 words. I hope this version works for you. I removed the wordiness and redundancies that were in the original version :-)

A prestigious education is at the heart of all goals I would like to pursue in life. Starting with a pre-pharmaceutical undergraduate degree I will be able to enhance my aspirations in the health field.Through this college, my first choice major would be Biological Sciences followed by Chemistry. By engaging in the Trojan Admission Pre-Pharmacy Program, I will draw myself to a community of scholars who have the same goals and aspirations and will provide me with the motivation to further pursue my dreams. At USC, I hope to familiarize myself with medical knowledge, so in the future I can help solve issues in health care. USC offers one of the most diverse and largest student bodies in the country. I cannot imagine a better combination to prepare me for pre-pharmaceutical studies and subsequently acceptance to pharmacy school, and being exposed to such a diversified study body that represent the world population is an immense advantage that makes a person one step closer to changing it.


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