To me, Pitzer is like a blank canvas. Across this canvas, students mix and spill their own colors and styles, hoping to create a meaningful portrait. Some succeed while others fail, but the result is unimportant because they have created colors of their own the process. These revolutionary colors represent the people they meet, the classes they take and the knowledge they share with others. Then, with their portrait in hand, they venture out into the world. Soon enough, the world becomes their canvas and Pitzer begins to represent the small scale model of the bigger portrait (the world). Exciting as this may seem, I do not want to get ahead of myself, so, let us begin the rough draft of my Pitzer portrait.
Obama's vision of purple is unity. My vision of purple is Han. Red signifies my fiery passions and blue represents my ambitions to make the world a better place. Just as red or blue alone cannot make purple, I cannot be who I am with passion or ambition alone. My passion to become a psychologist is largely supported by my ambition to better understand the world of autism. Over the years, our nation has become both fascinated and traumatized by the affects of autism. It has led even the brightest of psychologists into dead end corners and paths going to nowhere. More importantly, autism has become a heartbreaking reality for thousands upon thousands of parents across the nation. The dark clouds of autism have definitely casted their shadows upon many and I feel it is my duty to let the sun shine proudly through these menacing clouds. Though I have worked closely with an Asperger's Syndrome patient (Asperger's is a milder form of autism), I know that there is still a lot more for me to learn in the field of psychology and the topic of autism. I believe I will have the best opportunity to do so at Pitzer where I can join Professor Tsujimoto in his Abnormal Psychology class.
Culture is an intriguing aspect of psychology I am greatly fond of, which is why I created STRESS Club on my high school campus. I wished to address and formulate possible solutions to cultural flaws and extremes that plagued the lives of students like Virginia Tech student Cho Seung Hui and Troy alumnus, Azia Kim. Coming from a predominantly Asian school, my main focus was to eliminate the Asian belief that 'Ivy League=Success and Elsewhere=Failure'. Too many of my peers were being haunted by this mentality for me to just sit around and watch them suffer. I had to take a stance. My desire to understand different cultures for the sake of aiding fellow peers cannot be accepted (with normality) anywhere else but inside Pitzer's haven of superheroes.
In short, I want to drench my canvas in purple because purple is who I am; a passionate, ambitious Asian male whose social responsibility to help autistic patients bolsters his lifelong passion to become a psychologist.
Can anyone give me some advice?
President-elect Obama's vision of purple is unity. My vision of purple is Han. Red signifies my fiery passions and blue represents my ambitions to make the world a better place. Just as red or blue alone cannot make purple, I cannot be who I am with passion or ambition alone.
Now start a new paragraph:
My passion to become a psychologist is largely supported by my ambition to better understand the world of autism.
In short, I want to drench my canvas in purple because purple is who I am; a passionate, ambitious student whose social responsibility to help autistic patients bolsters his lifelong passion to become a psychologist.
Great! I just made a few small changes. You will do very well with this! Try adding a sentence of two to the final sentence. Make it a closing paragraph. I like how you come back to the theme of purple...
One more thing: What does "han" mean?
Thanks so much Kevin, you're awesome :)
Han is my name haha!
Sorry, my bad! :)
catchy essay!
hope you get in :)
Thanks ostrich!
Han,
When I said "sentence or two to the final sentence," I hope you figured out that I meant "sentence or two to the final paragraph." That's what I meant! My bad.
Also, that is funny about my confusion over the word "Han."
:)
Good to meet someone applying to Pitzer college.
I am applying to Pitzer college even though it's for safety
Yeah, I got that, thanks kevin!
and Kim, yeah...we all have safeties, but its still a college nonetheless
Soon enough, the world becomes their canvas, and Pitzer begins to represent the small scale model of the bigger portrait (the world). Exciting as this may seem, I do not want to get ahead of myself; therefore, let me begin the rough draft of my Pitzer portrait.
Obama's vision of purple is unity. My vision of purple is Han. Red signifies my fiery passions, and blue represents my ambitions to make the world a better place.
The dark clouds of autism have definitely casted their shadows upon many, and I feel it is my duty to let the sun shine proudly through these menacing clouds.
GREAT ESSAY! I loved the color incorporation. You did a great job! I did see a few issues where commas should exist. Other than a few issues, it was great. Good luck! I hope you get into Pitzer.
thank you!
