Hi guys! I wrote this essay for Texas A&M University. It is due tomorrow. So kindly help! I will help you too. Any ctriticism is welcomed.
Prompt- Tell us about an issue that is important to you and how does it affect you? (9600 characters)
A walk through the roads behind my house would display the richness of my country. The sight of cooked food thrown on the grounds beside it and the foul smell clinging in the air would make you feel that my country has abundant supply of food. Ironically, it is the nation where two and a half million people go to bed hungry, each day. "Annam parabrahmaswaroopam," says Indian philosophy. This means that food is equal to God. But are we giving the same amount of respect to food these days? Frankly, most of us do not.
In India, 30% of the fruits and vegetables perish due to the lack of cold storage facilities, while thousands of tons of food grains spoil in ill equipped warehouses. A lot of food gets spoiled and wasted during transportation and also due to natural disasters. These days marriages have become mere means to showcase people's status. Many families are staging extravagant displays of food at their children's weddings to show off their newfound affluence. Guests are fed not as per their need but as per the elasticity of their stomachs and the status of their host. It has been estimated that 15-20% of the cooked food at weddings is wasted. Even restaurants are estimated to throw away more than six thousand tons of food each year. India produces enough for its people, but the bulk of the food reaches those with purchasing power. Very frequently I see people dumping off the food in dust bins because it was over cooked or didn't satiate their taste buds. Even more frequently, I see poor, skinny children rummaging dump yards for even a single grain. In a country which ranks second in the world in the number of children suffering from malnutrition, this issue has to be culminated.
But food wastage isn't limited to India only; it is globally present. ."Around one- third of the total food produced in the world is lost or wasted every year", said Mr. Jose Grazianoo, Director General of FAO It has been estimated that the amount of the food wasted in Italy itself is enough to feed the hungry millions in Ethiopia and that, that in America two twenty five tons of food is wasted every year.
Food wastage has a massive impact on our lives. Apart from being a global concern and hitting our wallets badly, it also creates environmental issues as well. Food waste in landfills is the primary cause of methane gas emission, a very potent greenhouse gas. In waste converters, food waste is the cause of nitrogen dioxide, another greenhouse gas as well as a cause of smog and respiratory illness.
Wasting food squanders the time, energy and resources used to produce the food. There are so many things we can do to help stop food waste. We can plan our meals, start backyard composting and encourage our cities to start curbside recycling pickups for food scraps.We should buy only that much quantity of food which can either be consumed or kept safely at home. We should not waste food at social and religious functions. Control of weeds and harmful insects in fields and their proper preservation would increase yield of food grains, fruits and vegetables.
Food waste thus is something that we can't contribute to ignore. Mahatma Gandhi once told that if God were to appear to the millions of hungry people, it would be in the form of food. We must remember that "today's wastage is tomorrow's shortage" and thus mend our ways and live sustainably.
I love the fact that you have raised this important issue. Being a fellow Indian, I can very well relate to this problem!!! However, I feel you should talk more about how this problem affects you and appeals to your conscience.
I can't be of much help with grammar, but factually there are some aspects that you could consider.
I believe the essay can be more effectvie if you highlight the perpetual evils of 'hunger' and 'starvation' in India and not food wastage. Food wastage is definitely one of the major reasons for the plight of the famished and it is this impact of food wastage that , according to me, should be the crux of your essay. You could also talk about the inefficieny in the distribution channels which have caused disparity in availability of food grains. I hope this helps!!!!!!
Good Luck!!!!!!!
this issue has to be culminated. => you could say brought to light, or brought to public attention. Or perhaps you meant the issue had to be mitigated, or "the current state must be altered." or something.
Ethiopia and that, that in America two twenty five tons of food is wasted every year.=> eliminate one "that", and change the two twenty five part.
Control of weeds and harmful insects in fields and their proper preservation would increase yield of food grains, fruits and vegetables. => put this in the form you put the others, "we can..."
Food waste thus is something that we can't contribute to ignore.=> revise.
I think you could start off with your experiences about the plight of indian people and then get into the factual stuff. And perhaps you could bring the part about the solutions after you describe the trouble.
what I think you should do:
1your quote+ a
2Personal experiences about the plight of the poor.
3facts about how india starves
4but, this is not a problem that we can not fix.
5the stuff you said about how tons of food is wasted.
6your current ending. + more comments and ideas about how to bring this to attention and adress the problem.
It would help if you gave me feedback on my essay.
Hi guy,
I think there are some mistakes here:
"...make you feel that my country has the abundant supply of food."
"These days marriages have become mere means of showcasesfor people's status."
Why don't you use "dishes" or "fare" instead of "cooked food" to avoid a repetition?
Good luck!
