Hello,
I'm applying to a program I desparately want to join. However, with a very busy schedule, I am forced to rush through my personal statements. Please try to edit and better my essays.
Thank you,
Stephanie
Question 1: Why would you like to join ASAP? What qualities and experience can you bring as a member of ASAP? What are you hoping to learn?
The lessons in the world are endless, so I try to make every year count by experiencing new things through extracurricular activities. I was never one of those students who went by each year in high school without being a volunteer or member of an out of school program. This should imply how ecstatic I was when I learned about the Asian American Student Advocacy Project (ASAP) and the unique experience it has to offer; as I have to offer it.
I have strong confidence in myself that I will be an asset to ASAP. I hold a considerate, helpful personality that is needed everywhere. However, besides my personality and experience, I also hold one of the crucial qualifications necessary to be an ASAP member. I am an Asian born American living in a single parent home and knows the difficulties Asian Americans experience with limited resources available to them. I have a great imagination that I look forward to sharing to help ASAP reach its goals.
During ASAP, I will learn and mature into the confident young individual I know I can be. I wish to learn more about the Asian community so I can help improve it. Also, I hope to step out of my comfort zone and become more comfortable in public speaking. I am sure ASAP will be able to offer this to their members.
ASAP is a wonderful, one of a kind program that gives and accepts so much. I desperately look forward to becoming part of the ASAP community, and thus helping the community I will always be part of; the Asian American community.
Question 2: Give an example of a problem you think makes it difficult for Asain Pacific American students to succeed in school and prepare for/go to college. How would you raise awareness of this issue to your school, peers, and community?
"You're Asian, you must be smart! If not, you're a disgrace to all Asians." This is what many Asian American students are forced to encounter throughout their school years. There is not one Asian American that has not felt the effect of stereotyping at their school. Stereotypical remarks are becoming how others see Asian Americans. They are drowning in the identity "outsiders" created for them from the over dramatized movies that has plagued the community. This incognito has limited the resources available to them.
In Kenneth Woo's essay, Konglish, he discusses his difficulty growing up in America as a Korean American. He liked to consider himself as a science and math nerd, since he was scared to face the true reality that he was even greater at writing. From reading his essay, readers learn that a reason why he hid his talent was because he was afraid of the judgments he'll receive from other individuals knowing he was an Asian who was good at writing. Asian Americans in our community are being held back because of stereotypes, which are controlling them and their futures.
Individuals must learn to fight stereotypes and bring back the pride of being an Asian American in the community. There should be mentor support groups where students from all types of cultures could mingle together and learn more about each other to break the barrier between them. Because, many of the tight knit groups seen in schools are made up with only one culture; whether it be just African Americans together or just Koreans together. Secondly, the Asian Americans in today's society know too little about their origins. Programs should be available to them to gain pride and knowledge about who they are.
Asian Americans must gain the confidence in their cultures to break the stereotypes that holds them back.
Greetings !
An outstanding essay displaying excellent understanding of the topic. The arguments are clearly constructed and the essay is well organised and presented. There is evidence of outside reading and/or originality of thought and analytical skill.
I desperately look forward to becoming ( to become a ) part of the ASAP community, and thus
gives and accepts (accept) so much
knows (know) the difficulties
Regards
Isai, where does your username come from? What does it mean? I am intrigued...
Steph, in this situation, use hyphens:
member of an out-of-school program.
This imply aspect of my personality caused me to be ecstatic when I learned about the...
I desperately look forward to becoming part of the ASAP community, and thus helping the community I will always be part of; the Asian American community.---very good!!! But can you get a little more specific about what you want to accomplish and what is on your mind right now? Add 1 or 2 details. :-)
Asian Americans must gain the confidence in their cultures to break the stereotypes that holds them back.--- This is some good writing, for sure. I want to mention, though, that you can add a new dimension to this essay if you extend your contemplation to include a bit of discussion of OTHER cultures facing stereotypes... use your experience and perspective to understand multiculturalism in general as well as stereotype that affects other races.
