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Essays about meaningful life experience and family influence - FAMU admission


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These are actually two admission essays with two different topics. Please help me out.

Prompt : Describe an activity, interest, experience or achievement in your life (this could be a book,movie,an activity or an experience at work, home or school) that has been particularly meaningful for you.

Where I am from, when someone graduates as valedictorian from elementery school you are called "Student of the Year". The elementery school I attended had three campuses and graduating as top student out of the three campuses was a huge deal. To qualify as a candidate, one had to pass all exams with eighty percent or higher. I knew I had a good chance so I worked really hard.

SEE BELOW

Oct 7, 2009, 06:58pm   #2

Prompt : Describe an activity, interest, experience or achievement in your life (this could be a book,movie,an activity or an experience at work, home or school) that has been particularly meaningful for you.

Your essay should show HOW you became the valedictorian for your elem class. What did you do to gain that award? Don't just tell about when you got the award.


Prompt : How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?

"Also I am very appreciative of all the sacrifices she made to support my siblings and me. Whenever I feel like giving up I remind myself that if my mother ever gave up I probably would not be here."

Again, how did your family(mother) support you? What did they do (specifically)?
These are actually two admission essays with two different topics.Each essay has a word limit of 250 words. Please help me out. Thanks in advance!

Prompt : Describe an activity, interest, experience or achievement in your life (this could be a book,movie,an activity or an experience at work, home or school) that has been particularly meaningful for you.

Where I am from, when someone graduates as valedictorian from elementery school you are called "Student of the Year".To qualify as a candidate, one had to pass all exams with eighty percent or higher. I knew I had a good chance so I worked really hard.

I studied every chance I got. I stopped going to all my extracurricular activities just so I would have a few extra hours of studying. I even stopped watching television and surfing the web. I only stopped studying to eat, bathe and sleep. I was extremely exhausted but I knew it would be worth it.

When I went to get my results, my teacher told me that I did not get "Student of the Year". I fought back the tears and my teacher suddenly burst out laughing and said she was joking. I really did get it. My hard work paid off.

It was Graduation Night and it was going smoothly. Then it was time to deliver my speech. As I watched the crowd and started speaking, my anxiety began to decrease. Almost as soon as I began my speech, it ended and the applause was great.

After my speech it was time to give awards to students who did outstanding in certain subjects. My name was called along with others. Several people congratulated me. On the way home I started to cry. I was so happy. I had finally realized that hard work pays off and if you set your mind to something, you can achieve it.





Prompt : How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?

Scott Adams once said "The most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me" and I agree.

Living on a small island in the Caribbean, it is easy to get influenced. Many of my friends turned out to be "bad apples" and some are even dead. They got influenced by the wrong people, which often included their family. That is why I am forever grateful for the family I have. I am well-rounded and a kind-hearted person and I owe it all to my family, especially my mother.

The little things like always being present when I got my report card or driving me to dance lessons are what I appreciate and also the love and care she shows. For example, when I was sick for two weeks with dengue fever, my mother could have simply gave me my medicine and left me alone but she did not. She showed me such tenderness and stayed by my side. She even let me sleep in her bed with her so she could literally take care and have an eye on me 24/7 .Whenever I feel like giving up I remind myself that if my mother ever gave up I probably would not be here.

Everytime I see how great my family is, compared to others that are filled with violence and hatred, I realize that my academic achievements and good character are the result of the influence my family has had on me. The fact that my family, especially my mother, is always there to support me is the reason I want to be something in life and return the favor.
Oct 8, 2009, 02:21pm   #4
Prompt : Describe an activity, interest, experience or achievement in your life (this could be a book,movie,an activity or an experience at work, home or school) that has been particularly meaningful for you.

Where I am from, when someone graduates as valedictorian from elementary school you are called "Student of the Year".To qualify as a candidate, one had to pass all exams with eighty percent or higher. I knew I had a good chance so I worked really hard.

I studied every chance I got. I stopped going to all my extracurricular activities just so I would have a few extra hours of studying. I even stopped watching television and surfing the web. I only stopped studying to eat, bathe and sleep. I was extremely exhausted but I knew it would be worth it.
Ooohh...these sentences all start with "I..." Add more variety so it wont seem as repetitive. ALSO, I wouldn't put "stopped going to my extracurricular." Colleges don't like that.

When I went to get my results, my teacher told me that I did not get "Student of the Year". I fought back the tears and my teacher suddenly burst out laughing and said she was joking. I really did get it. My hard work paid off.

It was Graduation Night and it was going smoothly. Then it was time to deliver my speech. As I watched the crowd and started speaking, my anxiety began to decrease. Almost as soon as I began my speech, it ended and the applause was great.

After my speech it was time to give awards to students who did outstanding in certain subjects. My name was called along with others. Several people congratulated me. On the way home I started to cry. I was so happy. I had finally realized that hard work pays off and if you set your mind to something, you can achieve it.



Prompt : How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?

Scott Adams once said, "The most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me" and I agree.

Living on a small island in the Caribbean, it is easy to get influenced. Many of my friends turned out to be "bad apples" and some are even dead. They got influenced by the wrong people, which often included their family. That is why I am forever grateful for the family I have. I am awell-rounded and kind-hearted person and I owe it all to my family, especially my mother.

The little things like always being present when I got my report card or driving me to dance lessons are what I appreciate. I also appreciate the love and care she shows. For example, when I was sick for two weeks with dengue fever, my mother could have simply gave me my medicine and left me alone but she did not. She showed me so much tenderness and stayed by my side. She even let me sleep in her bed with her so she could literally take care and have an eye on me 24/7 .Whenever I feel like giving up I remind myself that if my mother ever gave up I probably would not be here.

Every time I see how great my family is, compared to others that are filled with violence and hatred, I realize that my academic achievements and good character are the result of the influence my family has had on me. The fact that my family, especially my mother, is always there to support me is the reason I want to be something in life and return the favor.
These are actually two admission essays with two different topics.Each essay has a word limit of 250 words. Please help me out. Thanks in advance!

Prompt : Describe an activity, interest, experience or achievement in your life (this could be a book,movie,an activity or an experience at work, home or school) that has been particularly meaningful for you.

Where I am from, when someone graduates as valedictorian from elementary school you are called "Student of the Year".To qualify as a candidate, one had to pass all exams with eighty percent or higher. I knew I had a good chance so I worked really hard.

I studied every chance I got even stopped watching television and surfing the web. I only stopped studying to eat, bathe and sleep. It was extremely exhausted but I knew it would be worth it.

When I went to get my results, my teacher told me that I did not get "Student of the Year". I fought back the tears and my teacher suddenly burst out laughing and said she was joking. I really did get it. My hard work paid off.

It was Graduation Night and it was going smoothly. Then it was time to deliver my speech. As I watched the crowd and started speaking, my anxiety began to decrease. Almost as soon as I began my speech, it ended and the applause was great.

After my speech it was time to give awards to students who did outstanding in certain subjects. My name was called along with others. Several people congratulated me. On the way home I started to cry. I was so happy. I had finally realized that hard work pays off and if you set your mind to something, you can achieve it.





Prompt : How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?

Scott Adams once said, "The most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me" and I agree.

Living on a small island in the Caribbean, it is easy to get influenced. Many of my friends turned out to be "bad apples" and some are even dead. They got influenced by the wrong people, which often included their family. That is why I am forever grateful for the family I have. I am a well-rounded and a kind-hearted person and I owe it all to my family, especially my mother.

The little things like always being present when I got my report card or driving me to dance lessons are what I appreciate. I also appreciate the love and care she shows. For example, when I was sick for two weeks with dengue fever, my mother could have simply gave me my medicine and left me alone but she did not. She showed me so much tenderness and stayed by my side. She even let me sleep in her bed with her so she could literally take care and have an eye on me 24/7 .Whenever I feel like giving up I remind myself that if my mother ever gave up I probably would not be here.

Every time I see how great my family is, compared to others that are filled with violence and hatred, I realize that my academic achievements and good character are the result of the influence my family has had on me. The fact that my family, especially my mother, is always there to support me is the reason I want to be something in life and return the favor.



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