We are born with the understanding that life is not fair. ( i need help making a introduction )
During a regular day of school on October 26, 2006, Daniela received a phone call to the front office. The phone call was from her mother to inform her that her grandfather Fred Carter, was about to say his final goodbye, and that he wanted to see her before he took his last breath. Daniela sat and begin to compensate how to deal with the horrid news of her grandfather dying. Her then came and checked her out of school , she rushed to their home so that Daniela can see her grandfather before it was too late.
Daniela entered the room where her weary sick grandfather laid to take his final breath. [...]
Hi there, Let me share some points
We are born with the understanding that life is not fair.{ you can add some phrase about the uncertainty of life to connect it to the next sentence like "We don't always get what we wanted and we don't know what kind of life awaits"}
During a regular day of school on October 26, 2006, Daniela received a phone call to the front office. The phone call was from her mother to inform her that her grandfather Fred Carter, was about to say his final goodbye, and that he wanted to see her before he took his last breath. Daniela sat and begin to compensate how to deal with the horrid news of her grandfather dying. Her then came and checked her out of school , she rushed to their her home so that Daniela can see her grandfather before it was too late {you need to restate this phrase like "Her mother came to checked her out of school then came home in rushed to see her grandfather before it was too late".}
Daniela entered the room where her weary sick grandfather laid to take his final breath. As she approached[,] him her grandfather [he] reached out h[er] arm {I prefer to use "hands"}, Daniela grabbed his hand and [she] held it tight. Daniela's grandfather smiled and he began to tell Daniela that he wanted her to live a happy life. He said that no matter how tough life might be[,] she should stay strong and continue to live on. Daniela's grandfather also wanted her to attend college. Her attending college has always been one of his dreams for her{you need to restate this phrase}. He also told her that he will forever be her guardian angel and that he will always watch over her. After saying his last words Daniela's grandfather Fred Carter then took his final breath and died.
Daniela took her grandfather's death really hard. She cried every [in] chance she got, she always went to his favorite restaurant, she just couldn't get over the fact that her grandfather had passed away{I think too much comas in this phrase ruin the sentence}. Until one day, while she was at home studying her mother entered her room with a little box. Daniela's mom had told her that her grandfather wanted her to have the little box. Daniela opened the boxed and was surprised by [of] what was inside of it . There were many souvenirs from when her grandfather had been in while he joined the army and . [T]here was also a little notepad filled with many [his] hopes and dreams that her grandfather had, and [about] her going to college was one of those hopes and dreams [them].
At that very moment, Daniela realized that she wanted it triggers her to accomplish the dream that her grandfather has always had [wanted] for her. Seeing the little notepad filled with her grandfather's hopes and dreams it made her want to succeed in life because she knew that it would make her grandfather [him]very happy. She worked [study] hard to graduate [from] high school[.] now she is fulfilling [She wishes that she can fulfill] [his] the dream of her grandfather by attending Bethel University. She is striving and working hard every day so that one day she will be able to walk across the stage and look up to heaven and say " Papa I made it "
In conclusion, ( i need help making an conclusion)
