Ahh Cornell! I am applying there :)
Yes, there are a number of grammatical errors in your essay that need to be corrected.
However, I think your content is more of an issue in this case. I understand how you are trying to present yourself as an athlete, however a lot of the background information (such as the introduction) is, in my opinion, quite irrelevant to the essay prompt.
I would like to go by the sociology of sport, in which I could provide help and research for groups of people who want to challenge the inequalities golf may have (gender, class, resources, and race) to practice this wonderful sport
^Just to clarify, does Cornell have a program in which sociology can be linked to sport? If so, then that is fine. If not, then just shows that you have failed to research the program properly.
Also, I may be wrong here, but I thought sociology was to do with how societies are organized and how different idealogies, such as Marxism and Neoliberalism, can affect societies? (I am not entirely sure.)
Also to see in what way golf and other sports contributes to social changes, and encourage to have more courses (environmental resources) for people who would like to play for fun instead of getting involved with the elite players.
^I do not know what you mean in this sentence.The second clause is confusing me.