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Good and bad points about my internship - feedback


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The Good and Bad Points about My Internship

An internship paves the way for putting your theoretical skills into practice. By having an internship, you will be taught more deeply on future work. Further, it also will look good on your curriculum vitae. During the 3rd semester, I had internship at Infinity Solution creating enterprise resource planning software. When I had internship, it was a life in the fast lane good and bad points were surrounding me.

Starting from theoretical skills what I have got in University, it was very shameful me for the first day. My first day was flooded with reading e-books, what I have absolutely not enough. Thus, I had to learn my duty from scratch. Throughout my internship I also gained network with the whole ball of wax(IT Professionals); Up until now I still have contact with them. Many lessons were accidentally taught to me, about real life experiences and I gained some confidence. On the other hand, I have just realized what were some people saying about the good points of having an internship.

I clawed my way back from every badness that I met but, the bad points were actually haunted during internship. I was knee-deep in duty and had got it bad, when I was endeavoring to solve my problem. Hence, I almost forgot everything about my real life. Through the 28-weeks, I would like a slave, doing whatever my supervisor commanded without any humanity.

In conclusion regarding the good and bad points of having an internship, I feel that the internship experience is really needed. For me, the main point of having an internship is that I can prepare the ground for real experience which gives me some confidence. So, overall having an internship is the best things that I ever did.

Any feedback will be greatly appreciate. ^.^


Creator: Muhammad Rheza Satria TA - .Swiss German University.

Are you trying to do a feedback of your internship experience or an admission essay or a curriculum vitae for work?

For the first paragraph, instead of "By having an internship, you will be taught more deeply on future work", you can say "Through an internship, one can gain experience in applying one's knowledge in the industry, preparing one for the workforce".

In the same paragraph, for the second sentence from the last, it should be "I had an internship"

For the next sentence, you should have started off like this "During my internship" instead of "When I had internship".
Also, I don't understand what does "in the fast lane" means, or at least I have never heard of such a phrase. You should just say something that implies that an internship has good points and bad points. Something like " it was a hectic, yet, rewarding experience".

Moving on to the next paragraph, it should be theoretical skills what that I have got in University"

Following that, the next sentence should be "Since my knowledge is not enough and I then spent the day reading e-books".

Moving on, instead of "Many lessons were accidentally taught to me, about real life experiences and I gained some confidence", how about " I learned many life lessons/skills on the job and from my colleagues experiences, which boosted my confidence".

For this sentence, "On the other hand, I have just realized what were some people saying about the good points of having an internship", please elaborate.
And for this sentence "Throughout my internship I also gained network with the whole ball of wax(IT Professionals); Up until now I still have contact with them", please rephrase as it is too informal.

Please substitute another word for "badness", since it is informal, which should not be the tone of this essay. I am sorry, I cannot think of another word now.

For the third paragraph, for the second and third sentence, just say that throughout the internship, you are very busy and was struggling trying to solve the challenges met at work.

For the rest of your third paragraph, your tone makes intership sound very unappealing.

Your conclusion could begin like this "In conclusion, regarding having an internship, after weighing the good points against the bad points, I still feel...(continue as you did)..
For the next sentence, in should be "point of having an internship is that I can prepare the ground myself for the time when I join the workforce, in terms of confidence and competence.

Last sentence, you make internship sound very appealing which is paradoxical, considering how unappealing you made it sound above.

These are just my comments, I have no idea how useful they are to you, hope you can use them.
First of all.. Zhiyang, I would like say thank to your feedback.

Zhiyang:

Are you trying to do a feedback of your internship experience or an admission essay or a curriculum vitae for work?

I am trying to do a feedback of my internship experience.

Zhiyang:

For the first paragraph, instead of "By having an internship, you will be taught more deeply on future work", you can say "Through an internship, one can gain experience in applying one's knowledge in the industry, preparing one for the workforce".

I agree with you.

Zhiyang:

In the same paragraph, for the second sentence from the last, it should be "I had an internship"

Thanks for the correction... :-)

Zhiyang:

For the next sentence, you should have started off like this "During my internship" instead of "When I had internship".

Thank you for your suggestion. I'll take consideration.

Zhiyang:

Also, I don't understand what does "in the fast lane" means, or at least I have never heard of such a phrase. You should just say something that implies that an internship has good points and bad points. Something like " it was a hectic, yet, rewarding experience".

"in the fast lane" It's an idiom. which means "a way of living which is full of excitement and activity and often danger".
See [font#blue]http://dictionary.cambridge.org/define.asp?key=life*1+0&dic t=I
[/font]

Zhiyang:

Moving on to the next paragraph, it should be theoretical skills what that I have got in University"

Following that, the next sentence should be "Since my knowledge is not enough and I then spent the day reading e-books".

Moving on, instead of "Many lessons were accidentally taught to me, about real life experiences and I gained some confidence", how about " I learned many life lessons/skills on the job and from my colleagues experiences, which boosted my confidence".

For this sentence, "On the other hand, I have just realized what were some people saying about the good points of having an internship", please elaborate.
And for this sentence "Throughout my internship I also gained network with the whole ball of wax(IT Professionals); Up until now I still have contact with them", please rephrase as it is too informal.

Thanks for the corrections and suggestions. I am glad it.

Zhiyang:

Please substitute another word for "badness", since it is informal, which should not be the tone of this essay. I am sorry, I cannot think of another word now.

How about "unpleasantness"?

Zhiyang:

For the third paragraph, for the second and third sentence, just say that throughout the internship, you are very busy and was struggling trying to solve the challenges met at work.

Thank you..

Zhiyang:

For the rest of your third paragraph, your tone makes intership sound very unappealing.

*laugh* Actually, I don't have any idea about the bad points having an internship.

Zhiyang:

Your conclusion could begin like this "In conclusion, regarding having an internship, after weighing the good points against the bad points, I still feel...(continue as you did)..
For the next sentence, in should be "point of having an internship is that I can prepare the ground myself for the time when I join the workforce, in terms of confidence and competence.


Zhiyang:

Last sentence, you make internship sound very appealing which is paradoxical, considering how unappealing you made it sound above.

Again, I should make a decision to entertain the reader about conclusion of my essay.

Zhiyang:

These are just my comments, I have no idea how useful they are to you, hope you can use them.

:-) Your feedback make my essay more clear. Thank you very much.
Zhiyang:
you can say "Through an internship, one can gain experience in applying one's knowledge in the industry, preparing one for the workforce".

Yes, this is the first thing I noticed, too. The reference to "you" can be confusing.

No need to capitalize the P (professionals) and the U (up) below:
Throughout my internship I also gained networking connections with the whole ball of wax (IT professionals); up until now I still have contact with them.

Here is another idea: active voice -------------> I learned many lessons by accident through real life experiences, and I gained some confidence.



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