Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 4


Elisa the Laptop- Story of someone in my life who is different from me, yet have learned from.


Guest /  
Nov 16, 2014   #1
Prompt: Share a story about someone in your life (not a family member) who is significantly different than you. How are you different and what have you learned from your relationship with this person? (150-200 words)

A laptop and a human being can be quite a duo. Elisa, otherwise known as my HP Pavilion laptop with built-in windows 8, is truly one of a kind. She and I have very different eating habits. While I can eat foods that vary from pizza to Tiramisu and chicken ŕ la king, Elisa gets her energy from the laptop charger that I am responsible for giving her on a daily basis. She is always in need of energy every few hours or so. How we respond to things contrast one another as well. When I get upset over something, I tend to be quite quiet and think of the situation. Elisa? She will shut down on me or constantly bring up pop ups of buying her a new set of security systems to make her stronger. She can be pretty persistent in demanding what she wants. Unfortunately, I sometimes succumb to her desires in order to gain access to what I need in order to complete a task at hand. I'm working on not falling for her commands so easily though, I swear. Elisa possess such intelligence that has helped me out in many ways. Without Elisa, I would have never learned how deep my ancestral roots go back. She is the reason why some old friendships that went dead for a period of time were brought back to life. The best part of having Elisa in my life, is her guidance that led me to discovering my purpose in life. In this modern technology-driven society, life has assigned me the duty to be a Computer Software Engineer, the hard drive behind the programs and devices that aids in fulfilling a task more efficiently and quickly.

Need some help in adding/deleting things.Tips?Please and thank you.
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Nov 17, 2014   #2
Samantha, I must point out that you have not answered the essay prompt at all. Just giving your laptop a name does not make it a person. The essay prompt clearly states that you must discuss your relationship with a person, not a thing. Therefore, you need to throw away this essay and write a new one, this time based upon your relationship with a person who is not a family member. It can be anybody from a friend, a school nemesis / enemy, a parental figure, or anybody whom you interact with daily with whom you do not share anything in common. Discuss how these differences still make you think of this person as someone who has a positive influence upon you. Spin it into a positive situation. That is what the essay wants you to do. Prove that you can learn lessons from the difference that exists between people. Again, people not inanimate objects. People, not items. Just people, human beings, not electrical or technological gadgets.
Ghfdw17 6 / 21  
Nov 17, 2014   #3
I agree with vangiespen, it needs to be a relationship with a person not a thing. It would be better if that relationship is personal to reveal more about you. Here you are just explaining why you like your laptop. Hope that helps :)
OP Guest /  
Nov 17, 2014   #4
I have actually talked to some people who are already admitted to the school I am in and they said that is really creative.To just plainly talk about someone, the differences,positive influences, etc etc can be quite plain/generic. In fact, someone I knew who did this prompt as well(who is part of class of 2018 right now), wrote about their iPhone. They were given very good feedback. They went outside of the box. The very personal relationships I have are only those of family members.Since I couldn't write about family members, I took a step further and gave something human-like characteristics as if it was a real person.In this day and age,some people do treat technology as if they were a human being(maybe this is just my own perspective)


Home / Undergraduate / Elisa the Laptop- Story of someone in my life who is different from me, yet have learned from.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳