I'm over the word count, so I was hoping some kind soul would be willing to help me edit/ or tell me what parts should go and what needs to be fixed! Thank you again!
Beyond your impressive academic credentials and extracurricular accomplishments, what else makes you unique and colorful? We know that nobody fits neatly into 500 words or less, but you can provide us with some suggestion of the type of person you are. Anything goes! Inspire us, impress us, or just make us laugh. Think of this optional opportunity as show and tell by proxy and with an attitude, but please restrict your submission to what will fit on one sheet of paper
Its pages are left unturned as it gazes at you open a new one, not even considering the emotions that's going through it right now. Feelings of abandonment, being inferior, and anguish well up inside, knowing that you will never know of the plot twists that were just about to occur. But do you care enough for that lousy looking book to continue reading it? Well, strangely enough, I do.
What makes me unique is my compulsive need to finish everything I start. I just can't get past how it must feel to be left there unfinished. I almost feel sympathy for a book if I don't finish reading it; as if it hadn't done its job correctly to give me that heart-grasping need to know the ending. These thoughts race through my mind as I reach towards a new piece of literature, knowing that I have one with an bookmark stuck 2/3 's in the way in. How must it feel to be left alone, knowing that no one may ever come back to read you?
What about movies? I have this odd feeling that if I don't finish it, I'll be missing out on the best thing that has happen since the new Justin Bieber single came out. Take for example, the movie Inception; in the beginning, nearly half of the movie goers were sleeping (one of them being a man in serious need of a Slient Snooz Snoring Aid). As my friends began arguing whether or not it was time to ditch the movie, I debated that we hadn't given the movie that much of a chance yet. First off, they gave me a bizarre look that spoke for itself at the fact that I had acknowledged that the movie as a person; Secondly, they decided that since every other theater was at its max capacity, that they'd stay and try to enjoy it. Toward the end, all of us were at the edge of our seats as we watched Leonardo Dicaperio and his colleagues save themselves from a vortex of time travelling. In short, best decision ever made.
Not only is this what makes me different, but I consider this one of my biggest pet peeves ever; when someone throws away a bottle of whatever it may be, with some of it left in it. Oh how it grinds my gears when I see a bottle of lotion sticking out of the trash with a perfectly decent amount of it left. It feels as though someone had ripped my heart out and did the Mexican Hat Dance on it. An unwanted feeling of irritation seizes my body as I stare blankly into the barrel of trash, thinking of how easy it could have been to finish that bottle of lotion. All it needs is a bit more squeezes before it is thrown in the trash for good; how hard is that to consider?
What I believe drives me toward the impulse of finishing everything I do must relate back to how much I care about other's feelings. It might be a bit unusual for you, my dear admissions officer, to find an undergrad applicant with the idea that even inanimate objects have emotions in them, but that's exactly on point with what I feel like. I just can't grasp the idea of leaving behind an unfinished object, with the idea that either I am missing out on the greatest thing ever, or that it could still be used and it's just being wasted. Whether the origin of these feelings may be, one thing's for sure: no bottle of lotion is being thrown away without an inspection by yours truly.
I think alicela really took care of a lot of the word count. I also have some little tips~
I really like your 1st paragraph. It's engaging; however, you don't stay on the topics of books through the entire essay - you don't want your readers to be thrown through a curve ball when you start talking about movies later on. Also, you could probably take out the last sentence in the first paragraph.
"I almost feel sympathy for a book if I don't finish reading it; as if it hadn't done its job correctly to give me that heart-grasping need to know the ending" > contradicts what you said previously about how you can't leave a book unfinished. You may want to talk about how you feel sympathy for books that OTHER people don't finish rather than yourself. But if you do want to talk about how sometimes you even leave a book unfinished you may want to state that earlier to avoid any confusion.
The part about Inception was interesting, but it should flow better. The jump from Justin Beiber to Inception is a bit strange.
Part about bottles and lotion should be taken out - it's off topic. It would be better if you talked about books or movie. It might be best placed before the Inception example.
Overall, interesting concept you may just want to stick with the idea that every book, movie, etc. you start deserves to be finished and given a chance. It's a better representation of yourself. Also, you'll want to fix the jumping of tenses - it makes it hard to follow.
By the way, I'm also applying to W&M! Good luck!
