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Common app essay (topic of your choice) - Fly high


chocolatelee 1 / -  
Dec 25, 2008   #1
Hi, my essay seems more like a personal statement, and it is about 600 words.
And I quoted from a novel, is it okay? Thank you for reading!!

Fly high
"I want to fly more than anything else in the world [...] You don't understand My wing. I can't move my wing."

"Maynard Gull, you have the freedom to be yourself, your true self, here
and now, and nothing can stand in your way..."
"Are you saying I can fly?"
"I say you are free." (Bach, 112)

In Richard Bach's Jonathan Livingstone Seagull, Jonathan challenges a handicapped seagull named Kirk Maynard to fly. Maynard had a dream, but not a belief that he could achieve his dream. I sympathize with Maynard gull who was once discouraged to fly due to his wings, for I was put into a similar situation. However, I regard myself similar to Maynard, not because of his broken wings, but because of his passion to fly.

Since I was young, I loved Art and dreamed about becoming an Artist. When I became older, my dream was transformed as an interest in Architecture, for I enjoyed studying Science and Mathematics as well. However, my circumstances did not allow me to develop my interest. My parents came to Indonesia as missionaries when I was seven. I followed my parents to a developing country, where I encountered different cultures and relationships. I wanted to keep up with my dream, but I had difficulty with financial support. I felt responsible to prepare for my future by studying hard, while my parents worked in their mission field with little sponsorship. My goal was a Korean college, KAIST, which gives full scholarship to all accepted students, and I gradually closed my interest in Art and focused on studying Science to become a scientist. My love of art was hidden behind reality and difficulty, as if Maynard tried to suppress his dream of flying behind handicapped wings.

When I moved to a small boarding school in countryside, I studied hard throughout my high school years, still considering Science as my major. My school's art department was also small and insufficient in providing Art education. However, every time I was exposed to an opportunity to paint, to build, or to draw, I discovered that I had true joy inside me when I do Art. I recognized how it feels like to be my true self when my enjoyment in Art outweighed any problems or any fatigue. As a prospective senior, I understood that it is somewhat late to change my direction. In spite of all concerns, my dream of Architecture became more vivid and clear in my head. After my junior year, I returned to Art and began to pour my effort and time to prepare for college education. I gained more passion and confidence in Architecture, which allowed me to combine my knowledge in Mathematics and Art. Also, I realized that I have acquired other valuable opportunities by paying attention to various cultures and academic subjects besides Art. The time spent for mission trips, school activities or musical instruments in fact strengthened my wings to fly high when I regained my dream; they taught me how to be creative outside of Art perspective.

At the moment, I am standing in front of future and saying, "I want to fly more than anything in the world." I know that my wings were once handicapped by difficult circumstances and that I might not fly as well as others, for I have started out late. However, I can confidently declaim that I can fly despite all obstacles because I have passion, love, and freedom found in Art. The experiences I had when my dream once stopped and my future education would strengthen my wings to fly higher. I want to fly high with my passion and my dream. My passion returned to Art. My dream returned to me. Maynard shouted out of joy when he discovered that he could fly. "I can fly! I can fly!" Now, it is my turn.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Dec 26, 2008   #2
The mention of the book is fine!! If you talked about it any more than you did, it would be too much, but you did great.

Since I was young, I loved art and dreamed about becoming an artist .

However, my circumstances did not allow me to pursue that interest.

At this moment, I am standing in front of my future and saying, "I want to fly more than anything in the world."

This is great, the way you go back to the flying theme. I love it! Hey, stop capitalizing unnecessary words, though! "Art" and "artist" and "architecture" need no capitals.

:)


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