What's your career plan?/ What do you wish to gain from this program?

I am applying to this police department cadet program as a 17 year old. I really want to participate but I think there is competition as there are only 60 spaces!

Can anyone please look over my answers to application questions? grammar, better structures, anything will help! thanks!

1. What's your career plan?

After months of consideration, I have decided to pursue a career in business. I would like to first enter one of the universities in British Columbia after I graduate high school and later major in either finance or accounting. Hopefully I can obtain a position in a respectable company and work my up the corporate ladder. I want to be someone who demonstrates great leadership and responsibility, as well as be the one who genuinely enjoys his career. I have also been greatly considering in choosing the career of a police officer. Being responsible of the general public's safety while emerged in our great community is something that makes me respect the police and dream of hopefully joining them one day. Therefore, I plan to stay active in the community after high school and possibly apply to become a police officer after university if I still have the desire and passion in becoming one.

2. What do you wish to gain from this program?

I wish to gain valuable life skills that will not only come handy in the future, but also help me shape who I am in the present. Through participation in an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, I hope to learn the qualities that people value on someone who strives to be a leader of the community. I also wish to closely observe the life of a police officer firsthand and gain more insight that will help me decide my career. I believe that this unique program will build my character through multiple challenges and activities I will face. In the end, I wish to not only gain from this program, but also later give back to the community using the skills I have learned.

Since you're in the midst of winning the slot among other applicants, it would sound better if from the very beginning of your response in question #1 , you already state how you've been meaning to be a police.

As I read it, it sounded as if being a police is your last option. Since tough competition is present you have to extremely express how you want the job and you're worthy of it other than other applicants.

as you know there is some stiff competition then you must give your priority to this program. stating that you would like to pursue a career in business would seem like you are not enthusiastic about it. to make your application promising enough to be considered, you must make them believe that you are determined to get into police academy and looking for an opportunity. you must show that it is not an option for you.

hope this helps :)