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Contributions to my community and what I have accomplished.


brayan1996 17 / 34 5  
Jan 5, 2016   #1
Discuss your involvement in and contributions to a community near your home, school or elsewhere. Please select an experience different from the one you discussed in the previous question, even if this experience also involved leadership What did you accomplish? How did this experience influence your goals?

I vividly remember hurricane Sandy. The destruction that it caused on many people living on the East coast is something I'll never forget. It was hard to watch the news and see the way people's homes, cars and businesses were destroyed. Everything that people did for protection did not help prevent the destruction that had occurred. I also remember how many schools, including mine, had closed for an entire week due to flooding on streets and subway lines. All of these things not only led people to lose their jobs, but also many of their possessions. Horrified by the sights that I was seeing on the news, I began to think of a way for my school to get involved. I spoke to my school's principal about creating food drives, movie nights and even a Valentine's Day party. All of these ideas were carried out to help raise money for families who had lost everything.

Twice a week for four months, many students in my school opened their hearts and dedicated their time to volunteer in this club. As the person who had come up with the ideas, I began to create flyers and posters along the side of other students who had chosen to give a helping hand. Some of the students brought boxes from their homes, others brought bags full of goods, and teachers donated money. All of these actions, gave me a sense of gratitude in knowing that all adversity can be overdriven when individuals stick together. Week after week, the students and staff at my school worked vigorously to raise enough funds and goods for families who were left displaced. Whenever I felt tired, I would simply look through the glassed windows of each classroom to see the effort that all of the students were putting into their respective tasks. I would look at each student carrying boxes and think to myself of what would have happened if I had not come up with a way to get my school involved. The urge to help was so strong that many of the students within my school, including myself, would stay after school to get things done. Sometimes we would even volunteer on Saturdays and take the boxes, to families and local soup kitchens. Other days, we would wear shirts with a sign saying, "Relief Funds For Hurricane Sandy," and put up a stand next to the school. My dedication and the dedication of other students within my school was, indeed, helpful to many of the victims that were affected.

The skills that I had acquired through this leadership experience were far more enriching than what I could have ever asked for. By organizing and participating in this event, I was able to drive past my diffidence. I became more comfortable communicating with those around me and began to see life through a different lens. Like everyone else, I had the obligation to help people. In seeing all of the damage that was done, I was more than compelled to do so. I began to see myself and my family reflected in the many faces of those adversely affected. I also began to think of what might happen if my family were to be in the same situation as the families that I was seeing on the news. Would people reach out to us, or would they simply stay as bystanders, looking at the desperation on our faces? Such question was one that I continuously asked myself day after day. It was the constant asking of these questions that motivated me to contribute to the relief effort of Hurricane Sandy. In contributing to this effort, my lifelong goal of becoming an airline pilot began to strengthen. I began to see the potential that I had to lead others around me. Likewise, my commitment to this relief effort gave me the confidence to realize that I was making a difference. This experience had given me qualities that until this day no price can match.

With all of this said, my commitment to bring a sense of relief to families affected by hurricane Sandy was by far one of the best things I had done. Through this event, I learned the role of a leader in this world. I was able to see how a leader is not simply judged on his/her good looks or personality. A leader is judged on the commitment and sacrifice that such person exerts on acts that help to establish change. Only when a leader is able to do such thing, can one say, with confidence, that a leader fits more than the definition of the word itself. A leader, simply, becomes more than a guide. A leader becomes the person who knows how to navigate through failure and setbacks. All of these things contribute to the monumental efforts that come together to make life more valuable.
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Jan 17, 2016   #2
Brayan, I'd like to share my thoughts on your essay.
I'd like to draw your attention to the last paragraph of your essay.

Final paragraph
- With all of this saidHaving said that ,
- sucha person exerts on actsactions that help to establish change.
- A leader simply, becomesis more than a guide.
- A leader becomesis the person who knows

There you have it Brayan, I hope my corrections and suggestions help in enhancing your essay,
I suggest that you re-write your essay with the suggested modifications and post
it back here on EF so we can assist you further.

Do let me know if you need further assistance, I also suggest that you mind your word choice
and make sure that your linking verbs are incorporated in your essay.


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