Love Finance ; Financial need statement; SCHOLARSHIP ESSAY

Hey everybody I have written this financial statement essay to apply for scholarship in my uni.I wonder if anybody can comment it or improve it in any possible way.

Loving Finance and working as a loan officer and be in need of financial needs is the contradiction of my life. Having an MBA in finance and working in the bank urged me to enhance my knowledge in field of finance and nowhere was better to do that than US. For all the pre requisites of admission such as GMAT and IELTS exams, I sat in Malaysia, where I took my MBA, outside my home country Iran since GMAT is not held there and IELTS not regularly. The cost of them including ticket fee, accommodation and exam fees were all paid by me. I also started saving to finance my master in UNT. living in a developing country which saving is difficult combined with hyperinflation and a sharp fall in Iranian Rial Exchange rate to USD(300 percent decrease) , ruined all my savings and blow over all my plans needless to mention that what a distressing situation I faced to buy USD in Tehran market. That is how a very disappointing condition beyond my control happened and has made this scholarship extremely critical.

As I look back to my life, I started my job as a teacher in my small home town, Kerman and worked hard to finance my turning point of my life to study MBA in Finance in Malaysia. Graduated with CGPA of 3.8 I got back to Iran and worked very successfully in Iran chamber of commerce and Tourism bank .I was chosen as the best employee of the year. I also worked in a distant learning institute and start teaching and tutoring bachelor students of finance .being hard working, energetic and goal oriented, I have set the aims to improve my knowledge in finance(CFA) and language learning(Arabic and Mandarin). But unfortunately due to huge changes of exchange rate I was successful just to finance one semester. As it is going ahead due to the sever sanctions imposing on my home country, exchange rate of Iranian Rial to USD is falling sharply and there is even no chance of money transfer between Iran and US. Hence only this scholarship enables me to follow my studies and dreams otherwise I would confront a desperate situation.

working as a loan officer and being in need of financial support(I think 'support' would be a better word than 'needs')


It should be ' working in a bank'

Hey, great essay by the way! All the best.

... I think this line needs a little bit of improvement in clarity;
I am in a funny situation; I love Finance and working as a loan officer while at the same time I need financial support for me.


For me, saving for my studies is an extremely difficult task due to the current situation in my country Iran, which is now subject to hyperinflation and sharp decline in its exchange rate. This distressing situation ruined not only my little savings but also my dreams and aspiration for the future. Now I am left with no other alternative but to strive hard to earn a scholarship that would be the only way left for me to pursue my plans and dreams