Explain any financial needs/situations that might clarify your need for a scholarship:
I deserve to have a scholarship for many reasons. My high attendance, academic achievement, motivation for college, and to achieve better is all reasons I deserve a scholarship. In my entire schooling career I have had minimal absences and was rarely missing school. I have obtained above a 95% attendance rate in my high school years, and plan to do the same in college. Another reason I deserve a scholarship is because I have worked hard most of my life academically. In high school I have obtained at least a 3.3 GPA all years of high school. My junior year in high school I took two advanced placement courses and I am taking one my senior year. When given an assignment I feel obligated to complete it as well as excel to make it stand out. I want to push myself to be the best I can and I fell college is a great place to better myself, but I can't pay for it all myself. In high school I never really had time for a job, because I was busy with cheerleading, attending church, going to school, and helping my family. I realize in today's financial situation you need to earn everything, and put your blood, sweat in tears into it. I will do my very best to complete my goal and dreams in life in order to support myself in the future. Winning a scholarship would mean I am one step closer to pursing my dream to become a nurse, and get a higher education needed for this career to make a difference in this world. I am hopeful to become one of your scholarships recipients, so I can continue my education to become a nurse in the future.
Feedback please!
I like if you change the tone of your writing. It is not written bad, but sounds more like a list of direct claims that you had good attendance, achievements etc. What does attendance represent? That's your commitment, isn't it? So tell things in a manner that you are committed and well deserving candidate for this scholarshop.
I deserve to have a scholarship for many reasons
... After convincing those reasons, you should have said this at the end.
