Hi all!
I browsed through some older threads and found helpful hints on how to refine the letter I am working on right now and came up with this so far:
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Dear Hiring Manager:
I am writing to apply for a traineeship position with the European External Action Service through the Junior Professionals in the EU Delegations (JPD) program.
This August, I graduated from XYZ with a Master of Arts degree in Economics with a grade point average of 3.73 out of 4.0. In summer 2010, I completed my Bachelor's degree in Business Administration with magna cum laude honors and a grade point average of 3.83 at XYZ with emphasis in International Business. For my academic achievements at XYZ, I was awarded the Academic Excellence Scholarship and earned the Outstanding Graduate Bachelor of Business Administration Award 2010. At these institutions, I completed numerous development- and trade-focused courses with high grades and also received advanced training in mathematics, statistics, as well as research and business writing.
As a result of my living in San Francisco, California, for more than three years and taking several language classes, I speak and write English fluently. During my studies abroad and also my work experience in Vienna, Austria, as a legal assistant in an international law firm, I developed sensitivity towards different cultural facets and potential difficulties in cross-cultural communication and teamwork. Classroom discussions on various political, economic, as well as business-oriented topics with students and professors from 6 of all 7 continents also sparked my interest in multilateral cooperation despite different agendas. Reaching an agreement through discussion and shedding light on contrasting opinions, accepting some compromise on each side, or agreeing to disagree in a respectful manner are challenges I enjoy taking on.
As I am planning to apply for PhD programs with emphasis on macroeconomics and generally focus my career upon graduation on external relations and policy analysis, I am convinced that the experience gained through a traineeship with the European External Action Service would provide the international perspective needed to thrive in these domains.
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The problem I have is that for most of the EU subs they don't give you much information on what exactly trainees are going to do there ("depending on the applicants background and qualifications"), so I am having a hard time explaining why exactly I'd be a good fit or why I want to get in. I'm guessing simple curiosity and the inspiring international atmosphere and future career opportunities will not suffice.
Do you have any suggestions/ ideas
1) on grammar, punctuation etc improvement?
2) how to spice it up in general? (don't want it to sound like every other letter they receive)
3) what other information might be interesting to them or which sections I should expand on?
Thanks a lot in advance, your feedback is highly appreciated :-)
Great! Good luck!
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I think that you should use transitive/signalling words between paragraphs. Because, I find these paragrahs unlinked together closely.
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In general, this is a good letter.
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