Graduating from college, cover letter is needed

hi, everyone. I'm a newcomer. This June i'm graduating from college. Of course, Cover letter is needed. Coud you plz read my Cover letter and give some comment. Thanks in advance :D

25 E2, CVD Urban Area
Hanoi, Vietnam
December 1st, 2008

The Personnel Manager

Dear Sir/ Madam,

I am writing to you in response to your advertisement for the position of teacher of English in your Language Center. Please find enclosed a copy of my CV.

My name is Dang Thi Ngoc Yen. I am a 4th year student in English Department, College of Foreign Languages, Vietnam National University. As it can be referred from my CV, I have been trained to become a teacher of English, so I would like to have a chance to apply what I have learnt to real life. I am also confident in my teaching ability for the experiences I got when tutoring and teaching as a teacher in the Teachers' English Training Center. My English skills are also proved by my good result at university and school as well as in international events such as the 48th International Mathematical Olympiad and the 39th International Physic Olympiad. I hope my work experience and ability suit the job. I would welcome the chance to work at your Language Centre. If you wish to contact with me, I will be reached by email: @yahoo.com

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,
Yen
Dang Thi Ngoc Yen

I am writing in response to your advertisement for the position of an English teacher in your Language Center. Please find enclosed a copy of my CV.

My name is Dang Thi Ngoc Yen and I am a 4th year student in the English Department, College of Foreign Languages, Vietnam National University. Due to my extensive training as an English teacher, I now seek to pass on what I have learnt. While teaching in the Teachers' English Training Center, I have made useful experiences and have become increasingly confident in my teaching abilities. My English skills are certified by my good results at university and school as well as in international events such as the 48th International Mathematical Olympiad and the 39th International Physic Olympiad. My excellent communication skills and work ethic make me a great candidate for this position. I would welcome the chance to work at your Language Centre. If you wish to contact with me, I will be reached by email: @yahoo.com




Those are a few changes I would suggest. I hope it helps!

Philip's corrections are excellent. I made a couple of additional alterations for you:

My name is Dang Thi Ngoc Yen and I am a 4th year student in the English Department, College of Foreign Languages, Vietnam National University. Due to my extensive training as an English teacher, I now seek to pass on what I have learnt. While teaching in the Teachers' English Training Center, I have had useful experiences that have increased my confidence in my teaching abilities. My English skills are certified by my excellent results at university and school as well as in international events such as the 48th International Mathematical Olympiad and the 39th International Physic Olympiad. My superb communication skills and work ethic make me a great candidate for this position. I would welcome the chance to work at your Language Centre. If you wish to contact with me, I can be reached by email at ____@yahoo.com

I am writing to you in response to your advertisement for the position of [T]eacher of English in your Language Center. Please find enclosed a copy of my CV.

My name is Dang Thi Ngoc Yen. I am a 4th year student in English Department, College of Foreign Languages, Vietnam National University. As it can be re[in]ferred from my CV, I have been trained to become a teacher of English, so I [and]would like to have a chance to apply what I have learnt to[in] real life. I am also confident in my teaching abilit[ies]y for the[due to my] experiences I got when tutoring and teaching as a teacher in the Teachers' English Training Center. My English skills are also prove[n] by my good results at[in] university and school[,] as well as [by my participation]in international events such as the 48th International Mathematical Olympiad and the 39th International Physic Olympiad. I hope my work experience and ability suit the job[and] I would welcome the chance to work at your Language Centre. If you wish to contact with me, I will[can] be reached by email: @yahoo.com

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,