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Five sense poem about an emotion


answers: 6
Apr 13, 2010, 07:44pm   #
Hi... can someone pleaseee help me create a Five sense poem ( a poem including you five sense color,smell,tase,sound,and feel) about an emotion.
I was thinking maybe First love i have a couple of ideas but i need a lot of help .Please please if someone can help me!!!!!!!!

Five sense poem
what color is the emotion
What does it smell like?
What does it taste like?
How does the emotion sound?
How does the emotion make you feel?

First Love
It appears out of nowhere, it hits you, seeing only white ,blinding you.
It is fresh like the cool air of a monday morning.
...?
...?
It comes crashing towards you booming like a thundourous storm.
...?
I feel a joyful new delight,something i will feel always.


That all i have pleases can someone please assist me with this pleaseee!!!!

Apr 14, 2010, 08:12am   #
in someway i can help u reply for my idea.................also use like only the way i feel can make you feel the same if you can go far enought to come up with that idea. express how you feel that is what poems are.
Apr 14, 2010, 05:26pm   #
hey, i wrote a peom about ture love but it didnt go like i planeed , so i thought how about jealosy. I wrote a five sense peom... what do you think? Is it any good? I was wondering if you could also help me make it better pleaseee!!!

Jealosy
Jealosy is the colorof a wreking ball hitting you in the face,blinding you.
Jealosy is the smell of a bitter aweet summer romance.
Jealosy is the taste of a rotten apple.
Jealosy is the earsplitting sound of smashing glass hitting the floor.
Jealosy is the look of a stingy person who only wants more and more
Jealsoy makes you feel like you are being teared apart slowly.


What do you think? Pleaseee helppp :)
Apr 14, 2010, 09:56pm   #
Hi, I'd like to help.
** Jealousy makes you feel like you are being torn apart slowly.
Jealousy is the color of a wrecking ball hitting you in the face, blinding you

Anyways, I thought the ideas were good, but I don't think "a wrecking ball hitting you in the face," describes the color of jealousy. Also, instead of wrecking, I'd suggest using "destructive" or anything like that.
Here are my suggestions on your poem:

Jealousy
Jealousy is the dark green color of envy
It smells like stale fog filling my lungs
Jealousy is the taste of a rotten/poisoned? apple
Jealousy is the earsplitting sound of fragile glass smashing/hitting the floor(this would most likely go under annoyance/anger)- I don't know about this one.
Jealousy is the look of deceiving/mischievous eyes that only want more and more
It feels like you are getting torn apart slowly(most likely go under sorrow/misfortune/heartbreak)/feels like a virus eating away?

I hope I have helped you! Good luck! ^_^
Apr 14, 2010, 11:38pm   #
how about...

Jealousy is the color of black, slowly holding you captive
Jealousy is the smell of summers past and innocence lost
Jealousy is the taste of ripe green grapes (its sour at first, then the taste slowly settles)
Jealousy is the crescendo of wolves snarling
Jealousy is the look of a pruned face after eating soured limes
Jealousy is the feel of (something) eating away at you from inside-out

I hope this helps, not that i'mvery good at it.
(Porkissimo, i hope you don't mind me recycling some of your lines right.)
Jealosy Jealousy smells like is the smell of a bittersweet summer romance.

I like this ... in the face, blinding you. I like how you add "blinding you" at the end even though you don't have to.

I was thinking about omitting some words to streamline the thing:

Jealousy is the color of a wrecking ball hitting you in the face, blinding you.
Smells like is the smell of a bittersweet summer romance.
Jealousy is t The taste is like that of a rotten apple.
Jealousy is the earsplitting sound of smashing glass hitting the floor.
Looks like a stingy person who only wants more and more
I feel like I am being torn apart. slowly.

So it goes:
1st line starts with "Jealousy"
2nd
3rd

4rth line starts with "Jealousy"
5th
6th
this gives it some orderliness to soothe the reader.



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