Allure with architecture and structures;Motivation letter for Masters in Germany

Hi everyone,
I have written this letter after a long time thinking about it, please help me review it.

I am grateful to have this opportunity to express my intent to apply for the Master's program XXX

My Fascination with architecture and structures goes back to the first time I built a house in virtual world as a child. Although that experience is unparallel with academic architecture, it was the first glimpse of what I desire to do as an adult in real world. Ever since Structures were of particular appeal to me and my professional objective is to design conceivable yet eccentric structures.

To fulfill this goal, I took extra classes to improve my drawing skills and got my high school diploma in mathematics and physics that empowered my numerical background. Subsequently I majored in Civil engineering, which made me eager to expand my knowledge in architecture after taking XXX course. Although the main purpose of the course was to familiarize civil engineering students with architectural concepts and designs, the course showed me how imagination materialize, specially after studying Santiago Calatrava's unique exceptional works. He is my inspiration Since his comprehension in both engineering and architecture enabled him to merge the boundaries of unachievable in order to design structural masterpieces. His impression on me pushed me to study architecture professionally to strengthen my foundation and acquire essential skills, theoretically and practically. In addition, I always had an eye for innovation and pioneering technologies, as they are inseparable with any field of science and art nowadays. As a Civil engineering student I am well skilled with various designing tools. However, I enrolled in classes in architectural soft wares that are thoroughly instrumental in making subjective concepts more perceptible and necessary to promote advance building technologies.

My strength point is that I can make accurate connection between different information and compound them in order to make sensible results. Indeed, I believe my background in Civil engineering and additional architectural skills would only be sufficient when I attend the right Master course to give my path a direction. Hence, help me understand and design feasible yet groundbreaking structures.

I always revered architecture for it is a state of art looking at by the right angle from scientific perspective. However, today's architecture requires another component in design which is the utilization of newfound technologies and materials. Thus conversational architecture entangled with innovation supported by science and technology is what I seek to persuade in Master study and XXX course embodies them all. Moreover, course curriculum encompasses all the necessary disciplines I need to experience and learn. And the diversity of prospective students and facilities in the course make it a more dynamic and refreshing atmosphere to let creativity bloom. Furthermore, what intrigue me the most is the multidisciplinary attribute of XXX that has the capacity to enrich my career and actualize my goal.

I am perpetual self challenger and the XXX course, beside enhancing my knowledge and unlocking my potential, will challenge me to excel myself constantly. Nevertheless, being a part of this program will give me a chance to investigate and study side by side of selective elite counterparts and professors in fields that I truly enjoy and aspire.

Sincerely Yours,

For me, this idea is not well-supported and developed. What I mean is you better give one or two examples explained what you say.


this seems vague. Can you say this more specifically?


an grammatical issue has been detected here.

Thanks

So far, this is well-supported and developed. :)


what do you want to try say here? As your reader, the words/phrases of atmosphere.. bla bla are too general, not effective or does not have any meaning any longer. Could you please make them more details? Or you might replace them with different phrases.

Thanks.

How about this?
Moreover, the curriculum encompasses all the necessary disciplines I need to learn. Besides, the diversity of prospective student backgrounds and facilities involved in the course make it an interactive atmosphere for even subtle ideas to unveil, cultivate, distinguish and glorify. Indeed, what intrigues me the most is the multidisciplinary aspect of XXX that has the capacity to enrich my career and goal.

Ya, ya For this I agree :)