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(Liberal art / China life / a Puzzle cube) - Skidmore essays


anpan 4 / 8  
Jan 10, 2012   #1
hey guys please check my essays?are they any good? also each has a 700 character limit.

why is skidmore a good match for my educational/personal goals.

Upon research, Skidmore's liberal arts environment and location is what initially attracted me. Though I plan on pursuing a career in business management, Skidmore's liberal art program will allow me to explore my other interests such as art and foreign language. Never having been to New York, I can only imagine the energy, the internship opportunities, the people. My love of numbers, cultures, people, and of hands-on experience caters to my love of learning, and with the study abroad opportunities and diversity on campus, Skidmore college offers an unparalleled study experience, which will enable me to further my knowledge in both business and the world around me.

Skidmore College is committed to creating and supporting a diverse and inclusive community. Please share a personal experience from which you gained a greater understanding of the value of diversity OR describe what you are seeking in a diverse campus community.

In my seventeen years of life I've lived in Saipan, Guam, China, and the mainland U.S. As a result, I've been in contact with numerous cultures and have come to appreciate diversity as a whole. Meeting people of different ethnic backgrounds allowed me to gain a new perspective on life and understanding of the world, and overtime, it taught me to be accepting of others' opinions and beliefs, no matter how different it might be from my own. Cultural expression has always fascinated me. To me, an individual's connection with the rest of the world is of great importance. Just as Elif Shafak said, we must "transcend through cultural ghetto", or "we too run the risk of being dried on the inside".

Please share an example of an instance when you feel creative thought really did matter. (Feel free to draw upon history or your own experience.)

During my junior year of high school, I was asked to design a puzzle cube for our semester project in intro to engineering class. Each puzzle cube could not have more than five puzzle pieces, while each piece cannot exceed the limit of five wooden cubes. With the criteria given, the possibilities were endless. I realized then, whether one aspires to be an engineer, artist, or businessman, we are always challenged to "think outside the box". Looking back on history, creativity is what allowed for the invention of ipad, android, or any other popular gadgets of the 21st century. It is only through innovative thoughts, are we able to do the unthinkable and improve our standard of living.
maianh94 6 / 18  
Jan 10, 2012   #2
I realized then, whether one aspires to be an engineer, artist, or businessman, we are always challenged to "think outside the box".

you changed from 1st, then 3rd, then 1st plural form. stick to one tense!
3rd essay: less about the prjject, more about your amazement about all the different possiblities

intro to engineering

capitalize it?

Skidmore college offers an unparalleled study experiencewhichthat will enable me to further my knowledge in both business and the world around me.

love of numbers, cultures, people, and of hands-on

uhm, second essay is a bit vague. what was your new perspective on life?

check my scholarship one, please!
saurabh93 11 / 94  
Jan 10, 2012   #3
Your second essay is a great topic, because diversity certainly influences outlook. But it can be better improved through specific examples. Please look at my essays


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