The 2500 of us in the program may be merely teenagers, but we were able to come together to form a mock government with a united voice even with our diverse range of opinions and ideas.
From working as a delegation constructing legislation to working in Sacramento as a fully functioning youth government, being a part of this program has been and continues to be a thrilling and rewarding experience.
The 2,500 of us in the program may have been merely teenagers, but we were able to come together to form a mock government with a united voice. Even with our diverse range of opinions we still succeeded in the end.
From working as a delegation(constructing legislation), to working in Sacramento(as a fully functioning youth government), being a part of this program has been, and continues to be, a thrilling and rewarding experience.
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thanks for all the kind words on my essay btw, if you have time to look at any of my others id really appreciate it
Although the program is compiled with 2500 merely teenagers with a diverse range of opinions and ideas, we were still able to come together and unite our voices to form a successful(?) mock government.
From working as a delegation constructing legislation to working in Sacramento as a fully functioning youth government, being a part of this program has been and continues to be a thrilling and rewarding experience.
Hope I helped somehow. Can you take a look at mine, please?
Though all 2500 of us in the program are merely teenagers, we were able to come together to form a mock government with a united voice even with our diverse range of opinions and ideas.
From working as a delegation and construct legislation to working in Sacramento as a fully functioning youth government, being a part of this program has been, and continues to be, a thrilling and rewarding experience.
Do you mind looking over my essay again? I made a few corrections.
Thanks!
The problem with these sentences in my opinions is Run-on.
You translate your native language directly into english, which is a difficult for students who take English as a second language.
Here are my suggestions
what? I speak English as a first language...
The 2500 of us in the program may be mere teenagers, but we were able to come together to form a mock government with a united voice despite our diverse range of opinions and ideas.
merely is an adverb so it describes mainly verbs, i think mere is a good replacement.
