Hi, all
This is my first draft of my career objectives, and I'm not a good writer, I really need some advice.Does the essay sound logical? Is the flow smooth? Can the school feel my passion?
Question:Why have you chosen to apply to the *** University? What are your short and long-term career objectives? How will this master program in accounting assist you in pursuing your career objectives?
As a public official, my father is an experienced and knowledgeable government auditor. My mother is an accountant, who is also involving in accounting field. My family background stimulates me with an accurate sense towards numbers. So when I went to college, I chose accounting major without second thought. I'd like to follow my parents' footsteps. And this February, I took part in a winter intern of KPMG accounting firm in Guangzhou, China. During that month, I learned and tried to combine theory and practice. This experience helps me find out my shortages in work and enlightened me to build a solider foundation to my future career.
After obtaining my master degree in accounting, my first step is to pass AICPA examination. My immediate objective is to find a job in an accounting firm where I can learn as much as possible. I want to be an auditor. This career requires hard work, patience and perseverance. I must start out on the bottom floor and prove myself. Through this career I will be able to advance from junior auditors to senior auditor up to manager status. There are intermediary positions in between. An important characteristic of an auditor is to be analytical. In this phase of my career, I want to build a strong base of knowledge and experience. Achieving my short term goals will prepare me for my long term career aspirations. My short term goals have no geographic or salary constraints. I will relocate anywhere regardless of salary in order to put myself in a position to gain experience and knowledge.
In the medium term, I'd like to obtain a secure yet challenging job back to China. By this time, I expect to work as a financial manager in a transnational enterprise in my home country. Hopefully, as a result of achieving my short term goals, I will have an impressive combination of knowledge, skills, and experience to move ahead. At this point of time, my primary duty is to assist with corporate debt and equity issues, generally head up new financing activities and lead teams to work on projects as needed.
My long term goal would be to get to the top of the corporate ladder. It would be nice to do this by climbing straight up one ladder, but most likely I'll need to jump laterally from ladder to ladder to continue my assent. Ideally, I would like to end my professional career as a CFO of a large, well-known corporation. I would get enjoyment out of knowing that I make an impact on the day -to-day lives of everyone my company influences.
Being an accountant needs to be knowledgeable and comfortable with all aspects of the corporations operations. An accountant needs to understand the broad implications of his actions with respect to the rest of the company. In addition, accountants need to understand the implications of his actions from an outside the company point of view. [School name]'s MS in Accounting program prepares students to excel in a global business environment. With a graduate degree in accounting, I can practice auditing, financial planning, tax compliance, and financial analysis for corporations, not-for-profit organizations, and government agencies both domestically and abroad. [school name]'s MSA program is the only one in Boston and one of the only three in Massachusetts with AACSB accreditation separate from overall business school accreditation. I know ***University will prepare me for my future path. But I also realize that to accomplish all that I want to, I will have to continue to learn new skills as I progress.
As a public official, my father is an experienced and knowledgeable government auditor. My mother is an accountant, who is also involving[[should be involved]] in an accounting field. My family background stimulates me with an accurate sense towards numbers. So when I went to college, I chose accounting major[[should be a major in accounting]] without any second thoughts . I'd like to follow my parents' footsteps. And[[Don't start a sentence with the world and. Try rewriting this sentence and then adding as well in the end.]] this February, I took part in a winter intern of[[should be at]] KPMG accounting firm in Guangzhou, China. During that month, I learned and tried to combine[[the skills of]] theory and practice. This experience helpsshould be helped me find out [[take this word out, it sounds better]] my shortages in work and enlightened me to build a solider foundation to my future career.
Thanks Shenise for advice!
What about other paragraghs? Did I answer the question in a clear and effective way?
Could anybody answer my question? I really need some comments. Thanks a lot.
This experience helps me find out my strengths and limitations in work and enlightened me in a way that enabled me to build a solid foundation to my future career.
Okay, I think you should add a new intro paragraph so that your para #1 becomes para #2. Add a paragraph that answers their 3 questions.
Then, explain the answer to the first question in para #2, the answer to the 2nd question in para #3, and the answer to the 3rd question in para #4. For each of those paragraphs, use a topic sentence to show clearly that you are answering the question.
I think you should use tis same material, because you have good points, but organize them carefully. Answer the 3 questions at the outset, and then explain those answers in the body paragraphs. Finally, in the conclusion (5th) paragraph, write some thoughtful ideas about the 3 answers to the questions.
Hi, Kevin, thanks for the feedback, it helps me a lot !
