Graduate Admission Essays

Sure, I will not tell you that it was easy because it most definitely was not.... »»

Kevin, Thank you very much! I got two more questions: 1, I really want to... »»

Thank you Kevin for correcting my grammar mistake with the explanation and making me confident about my... »»

afmajo: Please reflect on its content and write an essay describing why you see yourself as a... »»

1. Describe two examples of working with people, one of which highlights your leadership skills and one which... »»

This is the revised version, kindly comment. Thanks in advance! I would like to see myself... »»

Thanks a lot Kevin for the insightful suggestion. I shall incorporate the change right away. »»

I don't see anything wrong with this format. It conveys the idea you want to convey quite... »»

I see that you used a capital letter in a phrase after a semi-colon, up there at... »»

Being the oldest of 8 kids, I had thought that tutoring 3 middle school students would be... »»

You've got it covered. »»

thank you for the help »»

I don't think so. It is just a general statement, like any other document that is written... »»

Revised As I approached the one year mark as a participant of the Japan Exchange... »»

Breaking this up into several smaller paragraphs would help a lot, I think. Beyond that, try writing... »»

Thank you so much for all the inputs. It makes me a little more confident about the... »»

Thank you simone for the suggestion!! »»

helenwatson21: I have always been the number 1 mathematics student in my school. Once one is applying... »»

Very strong writer. I also want to be a physical therapist. »»

Thank you so much!!!! I'll try to correct it! »»

Thank you greatly for your insight. I will certainly take that into great consideration when I sanitize... »»

Just to be clear (since I may have not stated clearly in the above post): The... »»

I cannot help too much as I am, myself, behind in this part of the app process.... »»

mrchildchild: 2.How to improve my eassy? plz give me some addvice!,thx a million! It's awfully long, given... »»

reader2011: I am a good writer, but I guess the pressure of wanting to get into med... »»

EminK: What can you advice me to avoid my passive construction. Use an actual subject... »»

Pretty good. Some minor stuff: This drew me to study economics because economists are able to... »»

Any other suggestions??? »»

I have to agree that the organization of the essay itself was not very strong. You start... »»

"Working in a team, I showed up leader skills and organized our work" I'm also somewhat confused... »»

No, no... the beginning image is perfect. You just need to make it even more vivid... »»

"Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are."... »»

Thanks for the feedback. I will make the correction and repost. This really is a very useful... »»

Nothing too great with a very boring first half. ^I would have been more specific with... »»

Right. We'll be happy to help you write your own statement, though. Just tell us a bit... »»

sicologus: My name is John Doe. Presumably, your name is on your application. Omit this. sicologus:... »»

Thanks alot for taking the time to read my SoP and pointing at the really important facts... »»

For the most part, this essay is strong. To make it stronger, avoid wordy constructions (e.g., "tend... »»

kdm504: In fact, Draft 2 seems to satisfy all the suggestions I made. Right. And draft... »»

That's good to hear. Hope you hear back from them soon. »»

This essay lacks a conclusion. Even if it's only a couple of sentences, be sure to include... »»

EF_Sean: I mean, anyone who looks around the forums before posting would realize that this isn't the... »»

Once you have taken Simone's excellent advice, try posting both the criteria you need to meet and... »»

Choose a quality or set of qualities that you want the admissions officer to know about you.... »»

If you have made it to the Masters level, one sincerely hopes you have both the interest... »»

Thanks a lot for ur views »»

Thank you..I appreciate your comments and will expand on the purpose. »»

I'm guessing that you are referring to biotechnology (also known as genetic engineering). Nobody thinks that scientific... »»

rohi: the Scientist and Professors in You don't need the capital letters here. "I was... »»

Beyond getting a degree (which I could guess from the fact of your application alone) what is... »»

I notice you've got a lot of "to be" verbs in your first paragraph. This goes towards... »»

EF_Sean: Grrr . . . I hate it when I comment on people's essays, and then they... »»

Ah. I see that the author's account has been suspend, and so will withhold comment. »»

Where are you from? I am from China. »»

Thanks, EF_Sean! I have learned a lot from your comment. I will be cautious to the problems... »»

dream: also, just wanted to know is there anyway I can delete my essay after i posted... »»

Yes, it seems fine, especially if you have already had contact with professors in the program and... »»

Great sentence! Thanks Sean! »»

The highlighted portion seems fine to me. As I understand it, parallel computing is particularly hot right... »»

Hello Simone, Once again i am extremely thankful and truly appreciate your efforts in this regard.Thank... »»