With five years of work experience in two if the world XXXXX industry's best companies -- YYYYYYYY and ZZZZZZZZ (names of companies) -- I acquired a lot of hands-on experience, including ______, ______, and _________. about the way an organisation functions to maintain its standard and strives for betterment. I crossed out some mumbo jumbo that is too vague. Replace it with a list of specific examples.
...formal masters degree from an... (only capitalize if you name the degree (i.e. Masters of Business Admin)
During my professional life I have worked on various _______ (what kind of roles? add an adjective) projects in leadership roles.
...to be more tactful in taking decisions. (add a thoughtful sentence to conclude this paragraph)
Say "the Internet."
During my time with MNO I had the opportunity to understand the huge potential of the Internet to influence the world. Internet has revolutionised the world with... --- too obvious! We all know the Internet revolutionized things.
...live in with freely available information. I am very interested in the way internet can develop the education systems in developing nations. --- Google this: one laptop per child
I think that will interest you.
My long term goal is to start an NGO which will facilitate better education opportunities in these countries by collaborating with developed countries. -- This would be a great thing to make the theme of your essay. Write about it in the intro paragraph a little, because it is so impressive!
Firstly the Internet can...
... help in raising awareness to facilitate better resources to NGOs working for the cause. The Internet has been widely used for ...
:-) Nice!! You will be a big success.
You can help a lot of people by visiting the "Unanswered" threads!
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