"Speech is power: Speech is to persuade, to convert, to compel" Ralph Emerson

the essay is for grad school. any suggestion /critic will be appreciated. thanks
*submit a letter of intent indicating why you feel you are a good candidate for the graduate program*

"Speech is power: Speech is to persuade, to convert, to compel" Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Growing up in Africa with a cousin who did not start speaking with one word utterances till she turned two years old, I knew early on that she needed more help than she was getting. I wanted to help my cousin improve her speech so badly that I would watch Sesame Street, over and over to practice the pronunciation of various words and then teach them to my cousin, and had no idea that all that time spent practicing my articulation and phonetics would someday lead to a marriage between a passion and a profession.

During my pursuit of a bachelor in Nursing I worked on a class project about traumatic brain injuries. I was so fascinated by the function of the brain in language acquisition, comprehension and production, and that was when I discovered speech therapy and the Speech language pathology profession. Since then I have obtained a bachelors in the area of study and have continued to improve my knowledge on the field by attending TSHA continue education conventions and by observing speech language pathologists in the pediatrics home health settings. I have also been working on improving my Spanish proficiency and improving communication with American Sign Language

My career goal is to increase my knowledge about traumatic brain injuries and the communication deficits that occur as a result, and to develop the skills needed to diagnose speech disorders, develop and implement treatment plans. I also plan to volunteer with organizations like CLASP international in taking speech therapy to children in developing countries.

My GPA and GRE scores are also not a reflection of how well I will do in the master's program, but my grades in each communications disorders class from undergraduate studies is a better reflection. I am an A/B student. I retook Phonetics and Normal Language Development and improved my grad from C to A because the C grade did not reflect the kind of student I had become after my first semester in a four year college when I originally took those classes.

In order to achieve my professional and educational goals, a master's degree is necessary. Tennessee State University has a well-established comprehensive clinical and academic program that will equip me with the tools I need to succeed in the field of Speech-Language Pathology. Based on my research of the Programs faculties, I know that I will be studying in an educational environment that will encourage intellectual curiosity while instilling in me the ability to provide quality assessments and treatment plans for communication disorders.

I know that I am well armed to face the challenges of an online graduate school and that I am a good candidate for the graduate program because I am passionate about the field of speech language pathology and because I have a strong work ethic. I work very well with others and I am always seeking out an opportunity to learn. I am able to withstand stress and face challenges that come my way

I know that I will be a great asset to your university during and after my academic pursuit.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I can assure you that as a student and alumnus I will represent this program and the school with integrity.

Put a dash before the author when you are stating his line. That is the proper way of expressing a quotation.

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This is a very long sentence which just makes the reader tired to read it. Split this into two. The italic part should be made as a separate sentence.


I know that I am well armed to face the challenges of an online graduate school. Moreover, I am qualified to be a candidate for the graduate program considering my great compassion in the field of speech language pathology and strong work ethic.


Good luck :)

THANK YOU SO MUCH