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Topic sentence problems


aranger 1-1  Oct 27, 09, 05:31pm  #
I am having problems creating a topic sentence in the beginning paragraph would this be considered acceptable. This for an English Comp II class.

Since I was a young child my family has traveled to many places around the world mainly Central and South America. During a recent trip to one of my favorite places Belize I was amazed at the hostility toward Americans. At the local stands which used to be a great place to buy a soda and chat it up; most Belizeans now barley say hello. Most will simply hand you the requested item with a disdainful look. I soon realized something had changed. Belize no longer seemed to be the easy going friendly place I remember. I began to ask myself what happened to the love people used to have for Americans?
 
angie127 9-42  Oct 27, 09, 07:31pm  #
to draw the reader in, start the sentence with maybe some kind of experience, like a sight or a sound or a feeling. this is an example of my intro paragraph i used for an essay about my parents.

"Ready?" my father looks at me solemnly, then breaks into a childish grin. I squeal as he lifts me up effortlessly with his feet, his strong fingers laced between mine to secure my position above him. "You can fly, you can fly, you can FLY!" he sings the familiar song in his deep voice graced with a foreign accent. I spread out my arms and legs and imagine soaring over my dad and around our home. The support my dad's legs provide allows this fantasy to flourish, just as my parents' support has permitted the pioneer in me to explore the horizons that were inaccessible to them during their youth.

hope the example helps.

Angelica Cygan
 
EF_Kevin [Moderator] 2-3974  Oct 30, 09, 06:18pm  #
Yes, for this one the topic sentence might be a sentence about how feelings can change not just for individuals but also in a whole society.

...to be the easygoing, friendly place I remember.

A topic sentence is something you should sometimes write last. Write it after the paragraph is complete... a sentence that succinctly tells what you are about to explain.

Kevin, EssayForum.com
 

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