Thesis Statement of "Performance Enhancing Drugs in Sport"

I need help with my thesis satement. Can someone take a look please and give me some suggestions?

Performance Enhancing Drugs in Sport

Should congress enforce stricter penalties for athlete's who test positive for using performance-enhancing drugs? These athletes are in the public eye and role models to many children as well as adults therefore, they should face consequences for the use of these illegal drugs.

Greetings!

I think you have a good start on your thesis statement, but it is a run-on sentence. I might suggest a couple of small changes:

Because athletes are in the public eye, their actions can affect the children and adults for whom they serve as role models. Therefore, athletes who use performance-enhancing drugs should face consequences for the use of these illegal substances.

I hope this helps!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!

You're welcome!!! :-))