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"differences in work" essay


Gustavo 2-4  Dec 10, 08, 09:55am  #
Hi all, firstly I would like to say that I'm very glad to find this forum, which is a powerful resource to the english language.

Secondly I would like to no if anybody could help me to make my text more understandable to english speakers. I'm a non-english speaker trying to improve my writing skills, so any corrections, vocabulaire changes and other stuff related to improving my text would be very very nice.

Thanks a lot, and here is the essay:



Work is an activity that has always accompanied men and will still last for a long time. The ways of executing the work, on the other hand, vary completely and reflect existing social inequalities. While some people have great opportunities, others only have access to jobs that require great physical efforts, low earnings and conditions with no dignity.

Big differences in working conditions have been presented since old times. During the feudalism and the industrial revolution it was normal to see free men working for those who had the machines or lands. Those work relationships, which are not very far from the ones practiced today, have a lot of characteristics in common with slavery, and they illustrate well the lack of jobs with dignity for all.

The society has created ways to allow persons with better financial conditions, from families with bigger acquisitive power, to have access to the best job offers. Best quality education is, nowadays, an expensive privilege that is only accessible for those who can afford it and, as a consequence, best jobs are only accessible for those with acquisitive power.

Despite bad conditions of some jobs, there are others, such as those in sciences and arts fields that bring satisfaction to those who perform them, and are well paid, since they have great value aggregated in its products. However, few have access to these opportunities because they demand a great amount of investments. The low rate of these kinds of professionals generates more unemployment, and may become a vicious cycle, breaking the development of a nation.

All these different work conditions show us that men constantly change the way of work, but they still can't find a better way to split it with equal dignity. To live in a fair world we need that everybody has a good life and a good job and to that we need to concentrate efforts to assure work with more dignity and less differences to all.

hope u liked it

Gustavo
 
EF_Kevin [Moderator] 2-3967  Dec 10, 08, 10:15am  #
Work is an activity that has always occupied humankind, and it will still last for a long time. The ways of executing the work, on the other hand, vary completely and reflect existing social inequalities. While some people have great opportunities, others only have access to jobs that require great physical effort, low earnings and conditions with no dignity.

Society has created ways to allow persons with better financial conditions, from families with bigger acquisitive power, to have access to the best job offers. Best quality education is, nowadays, an expensive privilege that is only accessible for those who can afford it and, as a consequence, the best jobs are only accessible for those with acquisitive power.

Despite the bad conditions of some jobs, there are others, such as those in sciences and arts fields that bring satisfaction to those who perform them, and are well paid, since they have great value aggregated in its products. However, few have access to these opportunities because they demand a great amount of investments. The low rate of these kinds of professionals generates more unemployment, and may become a vicious cycle, breaking the development of a nation.

The wide range of work conditions shows us that people constantly change the way of work, but they still can't find a better way to split it with equal dignity. To live in a fair world, it is important to arrange for everybody to have a good life and a good job, and to ensure that people can work with dignity and equality.


This is a very meaningful essay! Thanks for letting us help. Avoid using the word "men" all the time, because it sounds chauvinistic. Good luck!!!!

Kevin

Kevin, EssayForum.com
 
Gustavo 2-4  Dec 10, 08, 11:15am  #
Thanks a lot kevin, your corrections were of profound importance for improving my writting!!!

Gustavo
 

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