PhD in Physics: need help in my proposal writing

Hi guys,
I'm doing PhD in Physics, i have done my first draft in my proposal but it needs some improving in grammer to be more academic. so please feed me back in my writing below.

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please guys help me out

Good afternoon!

Congratulations on your academic career! It takes a lot of hard work to get where you are; keep it up!

OK, let's see what we have for your essay; I think it's going to be easier if we take it one paragraph at a time, so I'll just go through it in blocks. Hopefully that will be easier for us both :) .

For the first block:
"Natural fiber-reinforced composites have been attracting researchers because of their unique properties such as strength, toughness, high modulus, low cost, low density, and environmental friendliness. Similarly, polymer nanoclay composites have been widely investigated due to their significant improvement in modulus, impact strength, barrier properties, heat resistance, and thermal ability."

For the second block:
"Natural fibers have been used as reinforced composites for their advantages. For example, they are light, cheap, tough, impact resistant, and have excellent strength and modulus. However, their wider application has been limited by their susceptibility to swell when submerged in water, and to rot.

For the third block:
"In the last decade a significant amount of work has focused o the improvement of the mechanical properties of adding clay into pure epoxy resin systems. Moreover, polymer nanoclay composites have shown excellent improvement in reducing moisture; however, their engineering applications have been limited for the lack of interfacial adhesion between the epoxy resin and nanoclay layers. My proposal provides a solution to these problems and revolutionize the wide spread use of renewable eco-composites".

Make sure when writing your proposal to not use a passive voice; don't tell me you are going to tell me something, just tell me. This not only makes you sound more confident, it is academically correct. Also avoid "I am going to..."; again, be confident. Just say it.

Please let me know if I can be of further assistance!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com

thanks thanks thanks for you ;-)
you just lift me up by your sweet words. and you have given me a hope to keep the good work up.

you got nice background. i wish i have that too hahaha

actually yes i still need help in another 2 pages.

thanks again and i really appreciate what you have done to me.
i hope we can work together next time.

sweeeet wishes

You're very welcome! It is very hard work you are doing!
I can't wait to see what else you come up with!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com

Attached on merging:
Cellulose Fiber - I want to improve my proposal significance.

Hello, I'm writing a proposal about Cellulose Fiber Reinforced Polymer-Clay Nanocomposites.
Whatever, I have done 2 different significances as you see below. But now I'm thinking to mix them together.. Actually, I want to improve the first one by adding information from the second one with keeping the same structure of the first one. I hope you got what I mean.
I want to show why my project is important.
Significance:- (1)
This project will focus on the technology advances in the cost-effective materials design and evaluation. It combines a novel processing methodology with new materials design concept for improved mechanical properties and moisture resistance.

Natural fibers have been used as reinforcing agents in composites throughout history as they are light, cheap, tough or impact resistant and have excellent strength and modulus properties. However, their wider application has been limited by their susceptibility to swelling in water and rotting.

Similarly, in the last decade significant amount of work has focused on the improvement of the mechanical properties of adding clay into pure epoxy resin system. Moreover, polymer-nanoclay composites have shown excellent improvement in reducing moisture. However their engineering applications have been limited for the lack of the interfacial adhesion between epoxy resin and nanoclay. This project will provide a solution to these problems and has a potential to revolutionize the wide-spread use of renewable eco-composites.

In this project an innovative process will be used to synthesize the clay-cellulose fibers reinforced epoxy nanocomposites. These novel structures will provide unique mechanical properties and good moisture resistance. Therefore this project will build essential links to the use of natural fibers and clay as reinforced composites for polymer resins. In addition, this project will provide new design concepts for developing multi-scale materials with multi-functional properties, and that will also give a significant impact on the future potential application of the technology.
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Significance:- (2)
This project opens the door to a re-focus on cost effective and eco-friendly material design. This proposal presents an opportunity for a better understanding of the processing of eco-composites made from natural fibres. When polymeric composites are reinforced with natural fibres they give a product which is light-weight, inexpensive, resistant to corrosion, impact resistant with a high specific strength and modulus. Such a product has high potential applications in the automobile industry, defence, sporting equipment, and marine roles. Historically, cellulose fibre reinforced materials have had a limited application due to the preponderance of these materials absorbing water and decaying. This proposal aims to resolve these issues, therefore, making renewable natural fibres a more attractive option for future applications. There is a also a growing need for materials which do not requires toxic agents in their production, are completely renewable, and in some cases, do naturally biodegrade, such as packaging materials and agricultural items. Also, natural fibre composite production is a process which is flexible and creates minimal wear on processing machinery. One exciting advantage of natural fibre composites, and one of the secondary objectives of the project, is the investigation the potential of using sources of cellulose, such as recycled newspaper or waste paper, in composite building materials. These materials could be used as windows, doors, roof systems and framing components in the construction of houses. House construction could occur without the need to draw from any finite resources, such as tree at all.

Thanks :-)

Good afternoon!

I see what you mean; let's try this:

"This project will focus on the technology advances in the area of cost-effective materials design and evaluation. It combines a novel processing methodology with a new materials design concept for improved mechanical properties and moisture resistance. This project opens the door to refocusing on cost effective and eco-friendly material s design. This proposal presents an opportunity for a better understanding of the processing of eco-composites made from natural fibres.

When polymeric composites are reinforced with natural fibres they create a product which is light-weight, inexpensive, resistant to corrosion, impact resistant with a high specific strength and modulus. Such a product has a high potential for applications in the automobile industry, defense, sporting equipment, and marine roles. Historically, cellulose fibre reinforced materials have had a limited application due to the preponderance of these materials absorbing water and decaying. This proposal aims to resolve these issues, therefore making renewable natural fibres a more attractive option for future applications. There is also a growing need for materials which do not require toxic agents in their production, are completely renewable, and in some cases, do naturally biodegrade, such as packaging materials and agricultural items. Also, natural fibre composite production is a process which is flexible and creates minimal wear on processing machinery.

One exciting advantage of natural fibre composites and one of the secondary objectives of the project is the investigation of the potential for using sources of cellulose, such as recycled newspaper or waste paper, in composite building materials. These materials could be used as windows, doors, roof systems and framing components in the construction of houses. House construction could occur without the need to draw from any finite resources, such as tree at all.

Similarly, in the last decade a significant amount of work has focused on the improvement of the mechanical properties of adding clay into a pure epoxy resin system. Moreover, polymer-nanoclay composites have shown excellent improvement in reducing moisture. However, their engineering applications have been limited due to the lack of the interfacial adhesion between epoxy resin and nanoclay. This project will provide a solution to these problems and has a potential to revolutionize the wide-spread use of renewable eco-composites.

In this project an innovative process will be used to synthesize the clay-cellulose fiber-reinforced epoxy nanocomposites. These novel structures will provide unique mechanical properties and good moisture resistance. Therefore, this project will build essential links to the use of natural fibers and clay as reinforced composites for polymer resins. In addition, this project will provide new design concepts for developing multi-scale materials with multi-functional properties, and that will also give a significant impact on the future potential application of the technology."

Even though you kept them as separate sections, both of them flowed nicely from one point to the next; it was easy to follow and you used clear, concise language. There is one more thing that maybe we want to change; that is the use of "In this project" repeatedly. With that said, I want you to read this edit over first, and then we'll see what we can do.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com