gabedreyer
Member
Posts: 2
Joined: May 16, 08
|
Mr. Perkins:
After witnessing your appearance on Anderson Cooper 360 on Thursday the fifteenth, I was appalled at your comments about same-sex marriage. Your remarks were incredibly offense to me, and many others, on multiple accounts. You have no right to say that a child requires a mother and father to develop into a mature man or woman. According to many adults around me, being fourteen, I have turned out just fine, having two happily married mothers in the state of Massachusetts. I have yet to see any heterosexual marriage affected by their matrimony, or the 8,000 other couples married since 2004, and I would be delighted to hear if you have. How does their marriage affect your marriage? If something as minute as two people's affection for each other can affect yours, then perhaps you should reconsider. Your notion that the California Supreme Court "has overturned the definition of marriage," has intensified my anger towards your ignorance and disgracefulness. As far as I am concerned, the "definition" of marriage is: the state of being united to a person of the opposite or same sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law. If you honestly believe that the California Court overturned that definition, you are sorely mistaken.
In addition to this senseless observation, I have found a plethora of unintelligence attached to your name. The Californian court has under no circumstances, as you have stated, "taken a jackhammer to the democratic process." Actually, you're right. The court shouldn't have assumed the powers of a legislative body. They shouldn't have had to! The legalization of same sex marriage should have taken place when Lincoln emancipated slavery! The last thing this country needs right now is managing the burden of this highly debated and "controversial" topic. There are enough problems with the economy, global warming, and so much more, that this is not something you need to be worried about. I doubt that if same sex marriage wasn't legal in Massachusetts and California, our country wouldn't be in a recession, gas wouldn't cost four dollars a gallon, and natural disasters due to the sudden change of Earth's climate, wouldn't have happened. With all due respect sir, I pity your naïveté, and hope that some day, you come to your senses and realize the true meaning of your thoughts.
You should be ashamed of yourself for the rude, and oblivious comments broadcasted on national television on Thursday, and you have absolutely no right to contradict the relationship of my parents, or any other gay or lesbian couple in this country.
|
EF_Team5
 Moderator
Posts: 2441
Joined: Apr 22, 08
|
Edited by: EF_Team5
May 16, 08, 04:57pm ¦ #2
Good afternoon!
Here are my suggestions:
"After witnessing your appearance on Anderson Cooper 360 on Thursday the fifteenth, I was appalled at your comments about same-sex marriage. Your remarks were incredibly offense to me, and many others, on multiple accounts. You have no right to say that a child requires a mother and father to develop into a mature man or woman. According to many adults around me, being fourteen, I have turned out just fine, having two happily married mothers in the state of Massachusetts. I have yet to see any heterosexual marriage affected by their matrimony, or the 8,000 other couples married since 2004, and I would be delighted to hear if you have. How does their marriage affect your marriage? If something as minute as two people's affection for each other can affect yours, then perhaps you should reconsider. Your notion that the California Supreme Court "has overturned the definition of marriage," has intensified my anger towards your ignorance and disgracefulness. As far as I am concerned, the "definition" of marriage is: the state of being united to a person of the opposite or same sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law. If you honestly believe that the California Court overturned that definition, you are sorely mistaken.
In addition to this senseless observation, I have found a plethora of unintelligence attached to your name. The Californian court has under no circumstances, as you have stated, "taken a jackhammer to the democratic process." Actually, you're right. The court shouldn't have assumed the powers of a legislative body. They shouldn't have had to! The legalization of same sex marriage should have taken place when Lincoln emancipated slavery! The last thing this country needs right now is to managing (change to "manage") the burden of this highly debated and "controversial" topic. There are enough problems with the economy, global warming, and so much more, that this is not something you need to be worried about. I doubt that if same sex marriage wasn't legal in Massachusetts and California, our country wouldn't be in a recession, gas wouldn't cost four dollars a gallon, and natural disasters due to the sudden change of Earth's climate, (Remove) wouldn't have happened. With all due respect sir, I pity your naïveté, and hope that some day, you come to your senses and realize the true meaning of your thoughts.
You should be ashamed of yourself for the rude, (Remove) and oblivious comments broadcasted on national television on Thursday, and you have absolutely no right to contradict the relationship of my parents, or any other gay or lesbian couple in this country."
Bravo! Nice work! Except for the few mechanical errors, this is a very structurally sound letter. Make sure that you are indenting when you have new paragraphs (new ideas or topics; i.e. "The last thing this country....). You stay very organized and on-topic, especially in regards to something you feel so passionately about. Very nice job!
Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
|
gabedreyer
Member
Posts: 2
Joined: May 16, 08
|
Thanks. When I pasted this in from Word, it didn't copy the indents, but the document is correct. Thank you for responding so quickly.
|