please read my: tell us about quality, accomplishment.....(prompt 2)

For the last four years playing football for the Cerritos High school, has been one of the highlights in my life. Before my freshman year I had no previous knowledge of football, and my arduous path to learning the game was set. I remember when I first came to play I wasn't in the best shape. I was a chubby slow kid, who wasn't strong as my coaches thought I should be. Football came slow to me, as I wasn't accustomed to playing a sport in which hitting someone was not only necessary but also normal. Though my first year playing football wasn't a successful as I hoped it would be, I gained more knowledge of the game, and applied that knowledge to my varsity years. After my freshman year, I believed that only the physically strong teams would always be victorious, but realized that football wasn't necessarily a chest match, it was a game of checkers.

Despite most our games were loses, I really enjoyed being playing with my teammates, every Friday night. As a team captain I enjoyed leading the varsity defensive line during football games. I understood that I may have to pick up the guy next to me if he is down, and make sacrifices for the interests of my team. Preparing for each game marked a new challenge for my team, and I believe this was the hardest aspect of football. In some ways it was similar to studying for a test. I could remember that for the many hours we were on the field practicing, our team was in the classroom studying the opposing teams offense, defense, and sets, as well as the countless hours spent in watching film. A flaw in a game plan could result in an embarrassing loss, however my teammates and I believed in the experience of our coaches. Playing football for the Cerritos Dons had allowed me to convey my potential to my best of my ability, and the learning experience I underwent was greater for me than any win in a football game.

I hope to pass over the knowledge that I have gained from my coaches, teammates and opponents to my life after high school. From basic ethic of teamwork, football has taught me to be a better individual overall. I have been better able to work with others, while displaying the leadership skills that I learned in football. I believe that I also have learned to be more trustworthy of others, because I learned to trust my teammates in the heat of battle. Some of the ethics required for a successful football team are true about life: Determination, Teamwork Confidence, and a never say die attitude. Football has awaken these aspects in me.

Good morning :)

Here are my suggestions:

"For the last four years, playing football for Cerritos High school has been one of the highlights in my life. Before my freshman year I had no previous knowledge of football, but once I started, my arduous path to learning the game was set. I remember when I first came to play I was not in the best shape. I was a chubby, slow kid who was not as strong as my coaches thought I should be. Football came slow to me, as I was not accustomed to playing a sport in which hitting someone was not only necessary, but also normal. Though my first year playing football was not as successful as I hoped it would be, I gained more knowledge of the game, and applied that knowledge to my varsity years. After my freshman year, I believed that only the physically strong teams would always be victorious; I soon realized that football was not necessarily a chest match, it was a game of checkers.

Despite the fact that most of our games were losses, I really enjoyed being playing with my teammates every Friday night. As a team captain I enjoyed leading the varsity defensive line during football games. I understood that I might have had to pick up the guy next to me if he was down, and make sacrifices for the interests of my team. Preparing for each game marked a new challenge for my team, and I believe this was the hardest aspect of football. In some ways it was similar to studying for a test. I could remember that for as many hours as we were on the field practicing, our team was in the classroom studying the opposing team's offense, defense, and sets, as well as the countless hours spent watching film. A flaw in a game plan could result in an embarrassing loss; however, my teammates and I believed in the experience of our coaches. Playing football for the Cerritos Dons allowed me to discover my potential to, my best abilities, and the learning experience I had was greater for me than any win in a football game.

I hope to pass on the knowledge that I have gained from my coaches, teammates, and opponents to my life after high school. In regards to the basic ethics of teamwork, football has taught me to be a better individual overall. I have been better able to work with others while displaying the leadership skills that I learned in football. I believe that I also have learned to be more trustworthy of others, because I learned to trust my teammates in the heat of battle. Some of the ethics required for a successful football team are true also in life: determination, teamwork, confidence, and a "never say die" attitude. Football has awoken these qualities in me."

Good job! Your paragraphs flow well and the structure of your essay is clear.

Regards,
Gloria
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