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Community Service Toy Drive and how it relates to who I am - UC Prompt #2

2 - Thank you for your reply! I am currently at 509 words for this essay but when combining it with prompt 1...

Undergraduatebryantasticcbryantasticc - 02:33pm
"my passion for troubleshooting" - essay for TAMU

1 - - It is actually the paragraph after this which contains the start of your essay responses to the prompt so...

Undergraduatesreevikvangiespen - 11:26am
I was like every child in my community

8 - Vangiespen, thanks for the good feedback. ;)

Writing FeedbackModewapModewap - 11:18am
Essays for International Youth Camp on Anti-Corruption

1 - 1) Why are you applying to participate in the International Youth Camp? If selected, what do you expect to gain from...

Scholarshipyukartilightjade - 11:13am
People in my hometown always associate "project" and "project people" with hope of a better change

2 - vangiespen, thanks so much for your feedback. In fact, I am desparate in revising my SOP. Every time I read my...

GraduateThao NguyenThao Nguyen - 10:52am
The thief. He was a friend... a teammate... but he is an enemy now. College Essay 1

1 - Aaron, the point of this essay is to show how you deal with racial, cultural, and social differences. Although your story...

Undergraduateaggieswaggievangiespen - 10:42am
Big city have many entertainment centers, better learning conditions and more jobs there

3 - Then your essay should have a minimum of 50 words per paragraph. Try not to use word fillers like so, besides,...

Writing Feedbackpnthien2451vangiespen - 10:10am
Benefit to home country.....applying for scholarship

1 - You did not fully understand the requirements of the prompt. What you are being asked to state is a particular project...

Graduatehim827vangiespen - 10:01am
"Who drove them out to the streets?"

3 - The grammar you used in the essay is properly constructed in American English. The overall format is clean but too formal...

Writing Feedbackacc123vangiespen - 09:47am
My intended major - economy in Shanghai, China

9 - N/A

Undergraduateyoyoproteinvangiespen - 06:23am
'The hideous alarm sound woke me up' - Got Social Anxiety? UC personal statement 2

7 - On the contrary, you should definitely keep the backpacking story as a part of your essay. That story shows the admissions...

Undergraduateyoyoproteinvangiespen - 06:23am
My activity in Tourism Ambassadors, because I broke out of my comfort zone - Columbia Univ.

6 - great choice of words try to complete this in two or three para

Undergraduatemelramadhanihim827 - 05:54am
As a kid I was curious to know the source of sound from that radio - statement of purpose for Msc

6 - Start your SOP with answers to this very basic outline: 1. What field of study do you want to...

Graduatehim827vangiespen - 05:38am

1 - Amirul, your essay needs to become more coherent and relevant to the topic being asked. I developed a template for you...

Undergraduateamrlashrfvangiespen - 05:35am
What problem that students are facing with?

3 - Okay. I think you are not sure about the writing process involved in developing an argument essay. You need to understand...

Essayshunhannvangiespen - 05:21am
Debate Team that I built from scratch

2 - Thanks vangiespen! You're very helpful as always :)

Undergraduatemelramadhanimelramadhani - 04:23am
The world I come from : small city / digital world (please help me decide) - MIT

5 - Of the two essays you've written, I believe that the second one does a better job of answering the prompt. You...

Undergraduatemelramadhanibryantasticc - 03:58am
SOP for molecular basis of health and disease program at Columbia University

2 - Thanks for your comment! I've edited my SOP based on your advice. Looks better :)

Graduateonnuri2014onnuri2014 - 03:57am
People around me always consider me as a bird of a different feather. UC Prompt 1

6 - Li-Wei, I managed to come up with 338 words. See if this works for you. Feel free to use or rephrase...

Undergraduatealan1213vangiespen - 03:55am
Being "The Outsider" in today's society! Concept in literature

1 - Oh sorry. I know what it means. I think you should write about: what those people do in front of...

EssaysAnoriegahunhann - 03:43am
Mathematics major; It took me quite a long time to finally realize what I wanted to study in college

19 - The combination of my suggestions and your original ideas seems to have worked very well. There are still some last minute...

Undergraduatesoftball16vangiespen - 03:30am
My dad and communities struggles have shaped my dreams and aspirations - UC Prompt #2

4 - Overall, your essay is personal. Just a minor grammatical correction, I've first handedly glimpsed should be I've first-handedly glimpsed Good...

Undergraduatebryantasticcmelramadhani - 03:13am
Spoils of Hard Work - Pitzer Supplement

1 - Hi! Your essay is generally good, but you should mention the core value of Pitzer that you've been engaged by...

Undergraduategman1997melramadhani - 03:05am
Reckless drivers in United States threaten the lives of thousands of people every year

1 - [Link / Image / Video / Quote]

Writing Feedbacksoriginalrazteria - 01:31am
The idea of giving financial aid to developing countries is a concept that is valued by most people.

3 - Thanks for the advice on how to set up the topic sentence and conclusion

Writing Feedbackkayjex31kayjex31 - 12:52am
Cause and effect for treatment of binge eating disorder

1 - Writing a cause and effect essay follows the same format as the other essays. The only difference being that you need...

EssaysNijelvangiespen - 12:38am
TOEFL : Young adults preference on how long they should live with their parents before moving out

2 - Thank you vangiespen for the feedback.

Writing Feedback99winterfell99winterfell - 12:32am
Who has the most enormous impact among people around the world?

2 - who can give me more suggestions? thanks

Writing Feedbacklogo3098logo3098 - 12:28am
Review "A little princess" by Frances Hodgson Burnett

1 - Duong, the first thing that you should ask yourself as you write this review is "What am I reviewing?" After you...

Book Reportssunnyjune93vangiespen - Yesterday
This village had only one primary school - my experience

2 - Thanks Modewap. The essay is support to be 750 words dear that's why it is too long

ScholarshipSanda3Sanda3 - Yesterday
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