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For the below essay i fetched band 5.0 , kindly review .

1 - This essay has major problems in terms of organization. The second paragraph should be a part of the introduction, where you...

Writing Feedbackdeepachiniwalah_zafari - 02:55am
The first important challenge my generation should aware is the Energy Sustainability

8 - Thank you very much Luisa, I really like the changes you made, you included all my ideas in more concise words....

GraduateElithElith - 02:49am
Agree or disagree: Students need one year of break after finishing high school

NEW - Topic: Some people think students who finished high school need to have a year of break or a holiday before continuing...

Writing Feedbackah_zafari -
I am applying to a master's programme, would you help me edit my motivation letter :)

NEW - Dear Sir/Madam: I am writing to express my deep interest in applying for the Master's Degree programme in Entrepreneurship and...

Graduatedijananedeva -
"In the beginning was the boy" - CommonApp (too informal/ironic?)

1 - Brilliant approach but what prompt are you answering? It's great and i hope it answers the question being asked.

UndergraduateDerpina357Prinz18 - Yesterday
Despite the wide selection of universities, my choice was The American University in Cairo.

3 - Your first two paragraphs sound more like a brochure trying to sell the university than an insightful look into how you...

Undergraduateomarsamahyvangiespen - Yesterday
The two primary crime data sources used in the United States - comparison.

2 - I was not looking for somebody to write my own paper, but there are certain topics I absolutely have no passion...

Essayscherishable07cherishable07 - Yesterday
The current energy sources that we use, contaminate our environment, as well as the mankind.

3 - just electricity? I suggest to change electricity to "energy" as a more general term. electricity is...

Writing FeedbackVns9xah_zafari - Yesterday
University of Minnesota (Twin cities) Why am I applying for chemical engineering?

1 - Ngoc, the academic interest is somewhat represented in your statement, but the goals are missing. The problem, is that you spent...

Undergraduatemyngoc311vangiespen - Yesterday
Essay on being unique - Everybody is unique in their own way.

3 - this essay has alot of great ideas just try avoiding the part where you say because although it shows great confidence...

Writing Feedbackroneomarsamahy - Yesterday
ielts: Are we becoming more independent ?

5 - Hi, you have asked for rating your essay, so I may give it a 5.5-6.5, depending on the grader. This is...

Writing Feedbackamirafahmymyngoc311 - Yesterday
The creation of a government is definitely for solving the problems (welfare) of the society

1 - The creation of a government is definitely for solving the problems(welfare) of the society, and problems here does not confine to...

Writing Feedbackthelearnerconfusee123 - Yesterday
In 1999 we procured our first home computer and since then my fascination with computers begun

3 - - No. They do not mean the same thing and each essay serves a specific purpose. A personal statement is...

Graduateconfusee123vangiespen - Yesterday
Social Media and reflection - my stand on it and why university prompt

2 - How is this? I'm sitting in the back of the class, trying to make myself small, my face hidden within...

Writing FeedbackArachnidArachnid - Yesterday
After I graduate, I will go back to my country and assist my aunt in managing her company.

1 - Yang, please consider revising your essay to cover the prompt in a more proper manner. The essay is not asking you...

Undergraduatebilibilivangiespen - Yesterday
Media should be allowed to publish information about the private life: Discuss two different views

1 - Okay, first up, you were being asked to only discuss 2 opinions in this essay, the pro and the con. Why...

Writing Feedbackah_zafarivangiespen - Yesterday
Management Engineering was not difficult to me (luxury management), an important learning experience

2 - Thelearner : You are right indeed, what I said brought others to think I did not recognize an obvious important thing....

GraduateElithElith - Yesterday
I'm new and need advice for my essay (SOP for entering undergraduate studies)

2 - We need to know your major and other information, we are all here to help:)

Essayspoochie96Elith - Yesterday
If the students study the same nation curriculum then they can equally perform in all the field

2 - All students should study the same national carriculum CURRICULUM at the school level is the...

Writing FeedbackkumawatakkiElith - Yesterday
Ielts: People watch more movies from overseas? What are the reasons for this?

2 - Globalization has decreasednarrowed the gap between different societies. One of the consequence of this change is that people are leaning...

Writing Feedbackswathi_12345ah_zafari - Yesterday
The different floor plan design; sharing space, bedroom, toilet, tatami room, balcony, kitchen

2 - Thank you!

Writing Feedbackkonbonkonbon - Yesterday
College Vs Career in Music: Why TRANSFER?

1 - There is information in your essay that should not be there at the moment. Trivia about the connection between hip hop...

UndergraduateCherryPac18vangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
My dad met with an accidents; Cornell/ Related experiences influenced my major

1 - Overall an effective essay in the sense that it clearly states the life experiences that you have head which have led...

Undergraduatej814wongvangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Piano, my source of motivation - Umich/ Extracurricular CommonApp Essay

1 - Yes, you should make applause italics in the middle of the paragraph. It signifies that the action is not a part...

Writing Feedbackf3bruar7zvangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Weddings in Vietnam and America - two different ways to celebrate it

1 - Lin, I am not sure where you got your ideas about how the American wedding is celebrated but there are a...

Writing Feedbacklinhchivangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Making a cover letter for summer internship in finance - someone with some experience?

22 - No, do not speak of any childhood interests or ambitions. Listen, you are mistaking a cover letter for a common app...

Letters24mandrakevangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Epidemiology of chronic and infectious diseases - paragraph from my Public Health Personal Statment

1 - Hi Sam, here is my suggested improvement for your paragraph. I hope it helps :-) Some people may ask...

GraduateGirl Next Doorvangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Youths against Racism Conference. I decided to be the answer to the problem.

1 - JJ, what prompt are you trying to respond to with this statement? It would help me get a better idea of...

UndergraduateJJLeevangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Why I Choose Georgia Tech to study chemical Engineering essay

13 - You can make any changes that you want to in the statement I created for you. It was only a template...

Graduatemyngoc311vangiespen - Jan 26, 2015
Spending for space Project is Justify, other consider to be useless.

3 - To conclude, spending government money on the space exploration is not wisely a wise decision On balance, my personal opinions...

Writing FeedbackfarazshamsiVns9x - Jan 26, 2015
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